Christmas..... the aftermath

We've now done Christmas 3 times..... my family on Saturday, Big Dubya's family on Sunday..... and then our own little family on Tuesday, with special guest star Aunt P.

Aunt P did not have the Norman Rockwell Christmas she dreamed of...... I'll give her another day or two to post about it, if she doesn't then maybe I'll attempt it.

As if we didn't have enough shit already, our house now looks like ToysRUs threw up --

We did a pretty good job of hiding the majority of the toys...... each of the kids kept 2 or 3 out and the rest will go into a closet..... kept in reserve 'til I'm desperate some rainy day. My cousin who has twins 14 months older than the 'lil Dubya told me that she's returning a lot of the presents her kids got -- but, I just can't bring myself to do that...... so, I'll just rotate them in and out of the closet.

Santa brought the kids one big toy to share and then a few smaller supplemental items. One thing that the Dubya and I didn't anticipate was that our Type-A, anal nature would compel us to spend more time with their kitchen than they do. See, the 'lill Dubyette just loves pulling all the dishes, pots and pans out and leaving them strewn all over the floor -- we end up picking them all up and then instead of just tossing them into one cabinet or whatever, we actually spend time arranging them in the cabinets, etc. -- ensuring all the food is in the refrigerator and all the dry goods are in the cabinet...... dishes are in the dish rack and the cups and the salt and pepper shakers are in their spot. It's absurd, and we keep catching each other doing it -- not to mention pulling slinky dog out of the oven twice an hour.

Oh well, for a few minutes each day...... I am treated to the sight of the 'lil Dubya and 'lil Dubyette "cooking" happily together and it makes me happy that Santa splurged for this gift that takes up too much space.

matching Baby Gap PJs courtesy of Aunt P

Belated Merry Christmas to all!

This year's outtakes

I'm sure the Big Dubya will be posting our Christmas Card on ye 'ole mantle this year..... some of you have already received it (or are about to) the old fashioned way. I'm always very hesitant to post pictures of the kids...... I know I don't really have many readers, but.... I worry about the sickos in the world -- so, the Big Dubya and I agree to post photos only on rare occasions and because Kara asked so nicely........ some of this year's Christmas Card outtakes for your enjoyment.

The day began innocently enough..... the Big Dubya and I getting the kiddies dressed up and trying to obtain just one decent photo of them sitting/standing/kneeling/lying next to each other.... looking in the same direction and/or smiling -- because, well.... both would be too much to ask.

After a while, it became clear that a photo of the two of them was not in the cards.... so I told the Big Dubya to try to get a decent one of each of them on their own.... we'd cobble them together somehow.

Easier said than done....

She eventually cooperated...... him, not so much

After a while, the 'lil Dubyette was just fed up with his antics -- and in true Diva fashion demanded that she be allowed sit in her trailer 'til her brother was ready to behave -- a hug from Daddy would have to do....

Apparently, ruining the family Christmas Card is tiring for the 'lil Dubya.....

110 shots later and we still had nothing good enough for the Christmas Card..... so we picked the best of a bad bunch and out they went. I don't think next year's experience will be much better..... next year there will be 3 of them

In case you are wondering how the photo shoot went....

The 'lil Dubyette got so fed up with her brother's lack of cooperation.......

She turned to her Daddy for comfort.

What a boob!

Oh good God, isn't his 15 minutes up yet? Does anybody else find this despicable?

Request for Prayer

This is "the" weekend..... we are going to attempt the annual Christmas Card Photo.

In the event you need a reminder of last year's fiasco..... here are a couple of the better ones... ones that almost made the cut

Fortunately, I'm not doing this 10 days post-partum like I was last year -- so although their may be some crying...... I'm hoping that it won't be uncontrollable sobbing by me. Unfortunately, I am on the wagon -- so no matter how stressful this gets -- the only comfort I'll be able to get is watching the Big Dubya get intimate with a bottle of Jameson.

I'm not sure if you all pray..... but, if you do -- please pray for me. If you don't pray, please send me positive vibes or whatever you do..... it would be really pathetic if the Dubyas had no card for the mantle

Random Thoughts

I wonder how many of McDonald's breakfast customers are pregnant women who are driving to work and need carbonation in order to keep from heaving.... just wondering.

For those wondering.... my breakfast selection of choice adds up to 12 Weight Watcher Points -- but it helped me stop puking on the ride into work.

Dubya News

Not sure if you've seen hubby's puzzle, but.... if you haven't -- go check it out

Those Sharpie people should really sell a solvent....

Despite the fact both of his parents were in the room, the 'lil Dubya got hold of a red Sharpie pen and introduced it to our fairly new (4, maybe 5 month old) sectional couch....... the carpet and a dresser took some abuse as well, but the couch got the lion's share of the "art".

It didn't occur to me to look at the time, but the Sharpie website does offer some guidance on stain removal.... apparently these guys have small children -- I might pick some up..... just in case.

The Big Dubya is supposed to be composing something witty, but let's just say...... our weekend was spent being "thankful" that we were able to get most of it out, and our kids "giving" each other a 24-hour bug that resulted in lots of vomit, diarrhea and of course..... laundry.

Black Friday

Tell me..... do you buy into the hype?

Do you go shopping the day after Thanksgiving?

Do you get up at 3:00 am and wait in line to get those bargains?

How is it possible?

My baby girl is a year old..... her first birthday was on Saturday.

I've been in denial over this milestone..... I just can't seem to get my head around the fact that a year has passed. She's so adorable.... I mean, I know all babies are cute and that I'm probably biased, but this kid is undeniably cute.

She's very much a Daddy's girl -- as soon as he walks through the door in the evening, she lights up and leaves whatever she's doing in the dust. She'll stand at his knee tugging at his pants until he picks her up and then she places her hands on the sides of his face and puts her forehead to his lips.

Where does the time go?

Satisfied Customer

Have you ever had a retail experience that just f'ing pissed you off?

How about one where the company went so far above and beyond that you were floored by their exemplary level of service?

A couple of weeks ago, the Dubya family was at ToysRUs and decided to pick up a small table and chairs for the 'lil ones. Nothing fancy, just something kid-size for them to color on, etc. Once we got home, I thought.... wouldn't it be great if we could get another couple of chairs -- so that when other kids come over they have a place to sit too? So, I went onto the manufacturer's website and sure enough.... I found that they do sell the chairs so, I ordered another set of 2 and a few days later they arrived.

Unfortunately, the chairs I got in the mail weren't the same color as the ones I got at ToysRUs -- same chairs, but different color. I figured I was out of luck, but I emailed the company anyway just to ask if there was a chance I could exchange them.

Let's be clear -- the company did nothing wrong, they sent me exactly what I ordered.... I just assumed they'd be the same color.... even the picture would have clued me into the fact that they aren't.

Apparently, the chairs I got at ToysRUs are part of a set that's a "ToysRUs exclusive" -- so they aren't available separately either online or at ToysRUs, BUT the customer service person tracked down a pair and had them shipped to me -- and then asked if I could leave the chairs I didn't want outside so that UPS could come pick them up.

Now that's customer service!

We are thinking of getting the kids a "kitchen" for Christmas and this experience alone would make me shop Step2 first.

What are you guys doing for Thanksgiving?

Three weeks ago

Nana Dubya: What are your Thanksgiving plans?

Mrs Big Dubya: We are just going to stay home --

Nana Dubya: Really?

Mrs Big Dubya: Yeah, we both have to work on Wednesday and it's just easier thank packing up the kids and trudging all the way home -- would you and Papa Dubya like to join us? We'd love to have you

Nana Dubya: Maybe -- we've got to see what everyone else is doing

Mrs Big Dubya: Okay -- the offer stands

Two weeks ago

Nana Dubya: Do you guys know what you are doing for Thanksgiving yet?

Mr Big Dubya: Yeah, we are staying home -- would you like to come out?

Nana Dubya: Maybe -- we'll see what your brothers are doing

A few days later

Nana Dubya: Are you guys coming home for Thanksgiving?

Mrs Big Dubya: No, we are staying home

Last week

Nana Dubya: Where are you guys having Thanksgiving dinner?

Mr Big Dubya: At home -- how about you?

Nana Dubya: We aren't really sure yet.

I'm starting to think that there might be some disapproval in our decision to stay home for Thanksgiving this year. We stayed home last year -- then again, last year the 'lil Dubyette was a mere 6 days old. I'm not a Thanksgiving person..... it's not my holiday -- to me, it's just a bigger version of Sunday dinner -- so, it's not worth the aggravation of traveling. I think my mother-in-law thinks that if she asks the question enough times, she'll finally get an answer she likes.

Champions!

Everything is as it should be

Dear Aunt P’s friend

When Aunt P called me on Saturday night to tell me that your mother was at “the end”, I just couldn’t believe this could be happening. She had just retired, you just had a baby, your brother is getting married next month…. she’s only 58 years old – how could she possibly be dying?

When the phone rang at 6:30 Sunday morning, I saw Aunt P’s number on the caller ID – calls that come at that hour rarely bring good news – no words were needed, I knew that she had passed.

When I saw you at the wake, I could tell the past few weeks had really taken a toll on you. You looked good, but tired and small. Gone was the young girl Aunt P went to second grade with and the teenager that carpooled to high school with us – before us stood a grown woman providing comfort to all those who had come to offer their comfort and support.

Your Dad looked so lost, and I just watched him trying to hold it together. It felt like you had assumed the role of the parent and he, the role of the child -- your strength was propping him up from across the room. You and your brother are truly the greatest gifts your parents ever gave each other.

The next day at the funeral, I sat next to Aunt P as she rocked your baby girl. It’s so unbelievably cruel that such a wonderful woman will never get to see those chubby little legs toddle their first steps or hear that tiny voice call her “Grammy” for the first time.

I know it's odd to say, but in a way I’m almost grateful that you didn’t lose your mom until after you became a mother yourself – because now that you are a mother, you can begin to fathom how much joy you brought her and how proud she was of the remarkable woman you’ve grown into. It doesn't soften the blow, but maybe it helps in some small way.

I’m sure it’s all a blur to you now, but the church was filled with the lives she’d shaped – friends like Granny, me and Aunt P – former students who were guided by her faith, her unintimidating style and her sense of humor – colleagues who followed her extraordinary example.

Unfortunately, she wasn’t blessed with a long enough life – but you should be so proud of the contributions she made to her community – and know, that her family was her greatest achievement and it is a magnificent one.

Lean on us when you need to
Love Mrs Big Dubya

Prosti-tots

I remember when I first read a post written by my good friend Kara, I admit it -- Kara, I'm so very sorry, I thought you were exaggerating..... out of frustration or for humor or for effect.

I was wrong, I was very, very wrong.

When she first wrote the post, I didn't have a daughter -- I hadn't really spent too much time shopping for little girl clothing -- and when I did, it was hoodies from the Gap or pajamas from the DisneyStore -- pretty vanilla stuff.

I should have been clued in when we went to DisneyWorld in May -- we were at the pool and my infant daughter was wearing something like this, other infants (yes, infants) I saw were wearing something more like this. I'm not sure a body that's still wearing a diaper is meant to wear a triangle string bikini top, but.....

The daughter of a close friend turns 4 next week -- she's tall for her age, so probably needs a size 5. I decided to go get her something cute -- I started off at the Disney Store.... thought maybe some cute pajamas or something princess-related. The pajamas? no, no really cute pajamas -- but they did have "nighties". I don't mean nightgowns..... I mean nighties -- sheer nighties. First of all, it's October -- almost November and this is Connecticut!!!! Sheer??? Where's the flannel?

I left the Disney Store disappointed and went to The Limited Too, well -- I only lasted 5 minutes in that store -- they are clearly the official outfitters of Prosti-tots -- I mean, seriously -- I wouldn't allow a teenager to wear some of the stuff I saw in that store. Gymboree was modest enough, but a bit too dressy for everyday wear and the everything I saw at OldNavy was just poorly made -- looked like it might disintegrate if you tried to wash it.

I ended up at my old stand-by, The Gap -- but they aren't getting off so easy either -- they had their fair share of baby-tart clothes too. I was able to find something 4-year old appropriate, but I had to shop for it and there weren't an abundance of choices.

What is wrong with people? Maybe we wouldn't be seeing stories about birth control for 11 year olds if we let little girls dress like little girls. No, I don't think we need to dress them like Laura Ingles, but how about keeping them fully clothed?

My name is Mrs Big Dubya, and I'm a Bread, Butter, Cheese & Cream-aholic

I've figured out why I'm fat......

I wish I could tell you that it's because I've been drinking too much beer or wine.... nope, haven't had either in a few weeks (geez, I better get on that).

I wish I could tell you that it's because I eat chocolate, cookies, pies, cakes, candy..... but no, I've got a huge candy jar in my office and I rarely touch it.

Nope -- my problem is real food. I love real, good, rich food. Big chunky bread slathered with creamy butter, cream-based soups and anything, I mean anything with cheese melted on it.

Aunt P's been trying to inspire me back onto the WeightWatchers wagon, but fate, fate I tell you keeps intervening.

This morning, I went downstairs to the cafeteria with my 1 point Thomas' English Muffin I popped that puppy into the toaster while the ginormous bagels taunted me. It came out of the toaster not toasted enough, so I popped it back in..... it came out burnt. I can't eat burnt muffin..... maybe I should get a bagel? or a big bowl of oatmeal with scoops and scoops of brown sugar.

I ate the burnt muffin..... it sucked.

Yesterday I wasn't so strong though... I went to get lunch at Baja Fresh I figured I could get something healthy there.... well, it's gone -- apparently it has been for a while, but Panera Bread was right next door -- I should have gotten a nice salad with a smart dressing, but instead I got cream of broccoli soup and this amazing chicken Caesar sandwich.... which comes with either bread or chips..... they made a mistake and gave me both and oh my Gawd was it good -- but, yeah I'm a big old fatty.

I need a support group.

We're all Coming Over -- Okay?

My family's coming over on Saturday -- my mother, my sister -- my mother's two (maybe three) sisters and their husbands -- maybe some of my cousins with their spouses and families.

I don't know when on Saturday

Don't know how long they are staying

Not sure if they are sleeping over

So, yes -- I have company coming on Saturday.... no idea how many, no idea what meal (or meals) I'll have to come up with for them .... no idea how many beds I have to make up or assign....

How does one shop for this?

In defense of the drive thru workers

I was reading the New England Mamas the other day, and I was kind of struck by a post written by a blogger I like reading very much.

I was kind of in a cranky mood, and started scripting a really snarky comment -- but then, thought better of it -- I like these ladies and don't want to piss them off.... over something so stupid. I've gotten the wrong food at drive-thru and it's inconvenient, it's annoying.... it sucks.

But, for some reason -- the post has kind of stuck with me and I figured rather than drop a comment on their site -- I'd just use my own space to share my thoughts.

In the interest of full disclosure, it has been a few years -- but I actually did work at a McDonald's drive-thru for 4+ years during high school and college.

Yes, I understand that sometimes there can be a mistake in your order. Yes, you should get what you ordered -- and it should be hot (or cold) when it is served to you.

But,

Did you know that these kids in the drive through are not making a ton of money?

Did you know that they serve hundreds of customers every hour with a fairly good accuracy rate?

Did you know that those booths are heated/air conditioned, but with the window constantly open it is freezing cold in the winter and boiling hot in the summer?

Did you know that often times that your car radio, loud exhaust and/or background chatter interferes with the speaker and that you can't always hear what the customer is saying?

Did you know that their performance is based on the number of seconds the car sits at the window? and that often times the cars behind you yell at these workers when you take a long time to get your money out or make changes to what you want once you get to the window?

Did you know that owner/operators won't let you just throw some ketchup in every bag because it impacts their bottom line? They make you wait 'til the customer asks for it.

Did you know that perverted old men drive through naked from the waist down to show you their "goods"?

I understand that you drive through because you are in a hurry and you expect them to get it right -- but are you really going to complain about a burger that cost you $0.99, a burger you couldn't even bother to get out of your car for.

The Holidays

Can you believe it? the holidays are fast approaching -- I mean, Thanksgiving is just 49 days away..... Christmas.... 82 days people, 82 days -- Did Easter even happen? 4th of July? I don't think I remember them..... where'd the year go?

Last year I was on maternity leave over the holidays, so I was able to do my Christmas shopping quite leisurely -- this year with a 10-month old hell bent on walking and a 2-year old who's hell bent on knocking her over -- not to mention a house, a husband and a full-time job -- I'm wondering how I'm going to get it all done.

Fortunately, I tend to be kind of organized..... I buy for a lot of children -- nieces, nephews, children of close friends.... so historically, I've picked one gift and given it to all of them. Last year it was the always comes in handy Gap Fleece -- good for 'lil ones, good for big ones, good for boys, good for girls -- reasonably priced when you shop the sale. Last November, I went into our local BabyGap/GapKids and bought something like fifteen of these babies. Not sure what this year's "Gift from the Dubyas" will be, but I'm open to suggestions.

Last year, I had so much time on my hands that I actually bought into the madness --

Does anybody know what this year's "hot toy" is supposed to be?

STOP TOUCHING MY CHILD!!!!!

It's so true in life.... everything happens for a reason.

Several years ago, the Big Dubya took a job -- a job that in the end, just wasn't a great fit for him. It's hard to regret his taking the job though, as it resulted in some of the great things in our life. It brought us to the area where we live which, for the most part, we love. And, it introduced us to the Buffaloes, who have become the most wonderful friends.

There were some other people we met in the course of this job..... some who we were friendly with, but then lost touch.... sad, but it happens. Some who we thought we were friends with, but as it turns out we weren't really..... disappointing, but oh well. And then there are the people that these people bring along with them -- girlfriends, boyfriends......

The Big Dubya was friends with a woman -- she was a lot of fun and we spent time with her and her boyfriend. We liked this woman, and the guy, well....... he was kind of strange -- but, other than the "ick" factor, he seemed harmless enough -- we kind of accepted him as part of the package. We weren't all that disappointed when their relationship began to fizzle out..... we'd hoped that she would move on to somebody better -- and then we lost touch with her, but we do know through some mutual friends that she did meet someone and married him -- so, it sounds like she's found some well deserved happiness.

Unfortunately, the ick dude..... well, he lives near us. For the past couple of years, we've somehow managed to miss running into him...... but you know it was bound to happen.

A couple of months ago, I was sitting at a traffic light and Mister Ick sped by me on a red moped..... I'll address my thoughts on grown 40-something men riding teeny-tiny mopeds in another post. I immediately called the Big Dubya and Mrs Cape Buffalo to relay my sighting..... I was thrilled that it was merely a drive-by and that I wasn't forced to make small talk with the guy, we had a good laugh and didn't give it a second thought. This past Saturday..... not so lucky.

The 'lil Dubyette and I were minding our own business, waiting in the deli line at Stop & Shop when I saw him. There was nowhere to run to, nowhere to hide. I could only bow my head and pray that he didn't see me...... I began playing with 'lil Dubyette's toes..... hoping to avert my eyes without looking like I was averting my eyes.

It was too late, he saw me --

Mr Ick: "Mrs Big Dubya, is that you? it's me Mr Ick"

Me: "Of course, hello Mr Ick -- how are you?"

We made small talk, and then he began rubbing 'lil Dubyette's head (WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU.... GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY BABY!)..... smart child that she is, she began to grimace and whimper -- lucky for him he stopped, so I didn't have to lay on a smack-down in front of the cheese case.

I got to meet Mrs Ick..... yes, apparently he found a Mrs Ick and they have a Baby Ick.... And then he started asking me all sorts of questions about his Ex.

Uhm...... kind of uncomfortable in front of new wife, dontcha think???

Other than she met a guy, moved and got married.... I know nothing -- so I told him that hoping to end the whole ordeal -- but he started discussing their break-up and how they'd kept in touch and that she'd moved to Virginia......

My deli number was called, so I bid farewell and placed my order -- praying that they'd just go away.

He did...... I proceeded to shop very, very slowly -- didn't want to risk a second encounter.