Ooops I did it again!

Yeah, so I did it again...... I was up late with the 'lil man, and I got sucked into another infommercial. No, I didn't buy, I didn't order, but I watched....... for way longer than I should have. Those are 10 minutes I'm never getting back, but..... let's just fantasize for a minute, shall we? I mean..... wouldn't it be amazing if all you had to do to lose weight was drink some coffee?

Why me Lord, Why me?

Is it my face? Do I just look like someone that you want to talk to about deeply personal things?

A couple of weeks ago…. I guess it’s about a month ago now, I was at the pediatrician’s office for the ‘lil man’s 9-month check-up. We got there a few minutes early….. honestly, I’m almost always a few minutes early…. I think it’s the polite thing to do.

Anyway, as we are sitting in the waiting room, another little girls starts making eyes at the ‘lil man. She was probably about 5 – she was very cute and the ‘lil guy couldn’t take his eyes off of her. As is standard, her mother asked – “Oh he’s cute, how old is he”? So I replied “Thank you, he’s 9½ months” – and then she asks me…. “Are you going to have any more”?

I often find this question off-putting, simply because it’s a very personal thing…. My mother hasn’t asked me if I plan on having more…. My sister hasn’t asked me if I plan on having more – I think they both know that I’d like to have one more, but it’s a very personal decision. So, to have this woman I’ve never laid eyes on before broadcast the question across a pediatrician’s waiting room…. Well, it kinda rattled me.

I responded that, “Yes, I hope to have another child at some point” -- Well, then I learned that, LUCKY ME, not only was she going to invade my privacy, but she’s also gonna do some sharing. “I’m not having anymore, I wasn’t supposed to have her, so I had a hysterectomy”.

What does one say to such a revelation? In my mind I was hoping that superheroes were real and that Captain Inappropriate was going to swoop in and save me, but no…. no such luck. I just said "Well, that makes her all the more of a blessing, doesn’t it?" – and prayed that if the Captain wasn’t coming to save me that a nurse would call us in soon….. and mercifully, she did!

It's Freaky Friday

The fellas over at DadCentric decided to turn the reigns over the their wives for the day.... so, head on over -- see what the gals have to say.... who knows, if the response is strong -- it could be a recurring feature.

They didn't get their money's worth today

If I work with or for you..... please stop reading, as my job will probably be in jeopardy.

I drove to work this morning..... I took my own sweet time, I didn't rush..... I was in no hurry. I stopped and got gas, treated myself to an iced coffee and then I went to the post office, bought some stamps and mailed a birthday card to a college roommate. When I finally got to work this morning, it was around 7:45 and I simply didn't want to be there. I started house-hunting..... we aren't in the market for a house -- we probably couldn't afford to move even if we wanted to, but it was fun to look at houses online that are 2-3 times the size of ours.... and that we could only buy if we win tonight's powerball -- hell, I even emailed a couple to the Big Dubya so he could join the fantasy with me.

Next, I started surfing the net..... I emailed Aunt P some suggestions for wedding favors -- then we proceeded to email back and forth..... mostly about stuff for her wedding. Around 11:30, I decided to take an early lunch break and run some errands -- I went to Bed, Bath & Beyond, Linens & Things, Pier One, Target and then I stopped at Subway and grabbed some lunch. I got back to work around 12:45ish and while I ate my lunch I started emailing Aunt P again.... describing what I was unable to find on my shopping excursion. At 1:00, I decided I'd goofed off enough and that I should get ready for my 2:00 meeting. -- then at 1:10, 'lil Dubya's teacher called.... he's got a fever and I need to go get him. So, I told my boss that I'd be leaving early and now I'm on the couch with my little man.

I'm not sure I earned my keep today, but..... I think it might put a dent in all the Sundays I've been putting in lately

It was a day of firsts

The Big Dubya and I have been married for a little over 4 years, we've lived in our house for about 2½ years. We have never been big Easter people -- we usually just stay home rather than trek to see our families in Boston and then get stuck in unruly traffic coming back on Sunday night..... and we intended this year to be no different. But then my parents (Granny & Granddad) announced that they'd like to come visit and Aunt P mentioned that she was staying home while Mr Tall Guy was headed to PA to visit his family..... so we invited them to join us -- it was after all the 'lil Dubya's first Easter.

It was kind of exciting..... before we moved to CT, I used to host both of our families for a chinese buffet (complete with too much to drink) on Christmas Eve, but ever since we moved..... nobody's wanted to come. I was a hostess with nobody to host -- so on Saturday morning, while we anxiously awaited their arrival, I busted out the china. Yes, 4 years of marriage and we'd never used the Wedgewood...... I had to take the labels off and everything. I then proceeded to set the dining room table..... Yes, 2½ years in our house and we'd never actually eaten in the dining room.

We had a lovely dinner (well, I thought it was lovely).... and it really did taste better in our newly christened dining room, on our newly christened china.

Now, let's see if they'll come for Thanksgiving too

How do you know when you are exhausted?

So.... how do you know when you are exhausted?

How about when you call the pizza place to order a pizza and when they ask for your phone number..... you stammer, and stammer and then simply declare that you don't remember.

Thank God they've got Caller ID

Miscellaneous Stuff

Sorry I've been out of the loop..... it's been the perfect storm in the Dubya house..... the 'lil guy's been under the weather and I'm in the process of changing jobs. You wouldn't think that changing jobs would take 6 months, but sometimes it does..... while I was on maternity leave my righthand person got offered and took a promotional opportunity.... so I've been without a right hand since September. So, when my own opportunity came along..... I was asked to stay on until they found a replacement for me (and the right hand) and of course, being a team player, I agreed. Well.... that was in November and I still haven't been replaced. Sometime during January or February, my new boss got frustrated waiting for me to transition over.... so he started assigning me work too. So, essentially, I'm doing three full-time jobs.... plus all the extra things I take on because I'm a type-A over achiever. As a result of this chaos, I've been working long days and most weekends for the past month..... (don't yu love corporate life?) and you guys have had very little to read from me.

Speaking of sucky corporations.... let's talk about the insurance industry, shall we? The 'lil Dubya was born premature -- and as the TV PSAs (Public Service Announcements) tell us, preemies are susceptible to RSV and should be vaccinated during the winter months (Nov-April). The NICU of the hospital where the 'lil man spent the first month of his life sent our pediatrician a letter saying that they strongly recommend the vaccination -- so the pediatrician supplied us with some info and after doing our own research, we agreed. Well, imagine our shock (because supposedly I have outsanding insurance) when our insurance company said they wouldn't cover the shots. So, (with an appropriate amount of attitude) I declared we'd pay for them out of pocket.... how much could they be, right? The nurse responded that it would be $1800 per shot based on his current weight -- and of course he's expected to gain weight, so it could be as much as $2,500 per shot by the time we were done. Okay people, I'm an accountant -- that's like $12,000!!!!!

I asked why they wouldn't cover it despite the fact that it was recommended by the hospital where he spent time in the NICU.... wouldn't they be in a position to make such a recommendation? They said that the 'lil man didn't have enough of the risk factors... he was one short..... what do you mean? I asked incredulously? He was born premature, asthma runs in his family, he goes to daycare..... all risk factors. The case worker kindly responded "Yes dear, but you and your husband don't smoke -- if you were smokers, he'd be covered"

So, my insurance company is penalizing my child because we live a healthy lifestyle.... AWESOME! We ended up getting the shots covered through my RX coverage... albeit with a hefty co-pay.

Lastly, these things are fabulous!

Ten Things Mrs Big Dubya cannot do

10. Well, it has already been well documented that I cannot fold a fitted sheet.
9. Hard as I try, I cannot stick to a diet or a budget
8. As much as I'd love to, I cannot sleep in...... even back in the day when all my friends were snoozin' until noon -- I was up and at 'em by 6.
7. I cannot, for some unfathomable reason, put on a black outfit withough smearing it with either deodorant or toothpaste.
6. I cannot stick to the speed limit -- I'm always pushing it just a little bit
5. I cannot keep stuff from piling up on our kitchen island or on our dining room table (mail, candles, boxes, UGHHH....)
4. I cannot paint my own nails -- toes, I can do okay (not great, but okay) -- fingers -- hopeless
3. I cannot have just one -- of anything.... potato chips, french fries, glasses of wine, beers.....
2. I'm running out of steam here..... I guess I can't come up with a list of 10 things
1. I cannot get the damn ointment into the 'lil Dubya's eyes

Yes friends, the 'lil man woke up this morning with his eyes gooed shut. Pink eye has hit everyone in his class..... 5 babies were sent home on Tuesday -- there are only 7 babies in the class. Four of them simply had fevers -- one ended up with bronchitis, pink eye and two ear infections. When the 'lil man woke up with his eyes gooed shut I wasn't overly concerned -- he wakes up with eye boogers from time to time -- we wipe 'em up and we're good to go. Well, today was different -- the more I wiped, the more boogers formed. The Big Dubya had to work today, so I was torn as to what to do -- there was no fever and no "pink".... doesn't "pink eye" have to involve some "pink"? But, I figured we could give the pediatrician a buzz anyway.... he's got Saturday morning hours and my logic said that I'd rather call him today, then wake up tomorrow wishing I had.

Have I mentioned that I LOVE our pediatrician? He's not hot or anything like Beth's, but he's just so kind and laid back and he's never made me feel bad for calling or bringing the 'lil guy in. I must be a pediatrician's worst nightmare..... first time mother, mother of a preemie, no family in the area to consult...... but he's been awesome since day one. In fairness to me, I don't call him with every little thing, and most of the time he's told me that we were right to bring him in -- so I reported to the pediatrician's office this morning with my eye booger ridden baby in tow.

Yeah, these need to be treated...... usually boogers of this caliber are the start of something bigger -- might just be a headcold, but let's keep an eye on him. He prescribed some ointment..... and that's when I learned how hard it is to get ointment into a 10-month old's eyes!

One dose applied...... 20 more to go (3 per day X 7 days = 21 doses - 1 dose administered this morning.... 20 to go)

A few things I've learned since becoming a mother

Just thought I'd share a few words of wisdom (?).....

Velcro bibs are a great idea -- that is until a) you try to take them off a sleeping baby (NOISY!!!) and b) until you put them in the washer/dryer...... they tend to stick to and snag everything else in the load... those nice knit blankets in particular.

Baby food (pureed fruits and/or vegetables) stains like crazy. On the bright side, I've saved more than one cute outfit with the Clorox Bleach Pen! (I'd like to thank Cape Buffalo for that tip)

Baby wipes..... are great at taking stains out of our clothes -- they even help rub out deodorant and toothpaste!

The written word

When the Big Dubya and I started dating, much of our courtship was conducted via email. In some ways it sounds quite impersonal -- but it really wasn't.... it more harkened back to the days of letter-writing, which in my humble opinion is a dying art.

In the beginning I remember fretting and laboring over every word -- didn't want to sound disinterested, didn't want to sound over-interested.... didn't want to sound too serious.... didn't want to sound like a flake. I suspect similar consternation was happening on the other end of the carefully worded emails I received in response.

As time went on, we got more comfortable with each other -- and the word/phrase choice became less important. As a result, on more than one occasion one of us would dash out an email and the other would read "voice" or "tone" into the message that simply wasn't there .... and sad to say, a few times it escalated into a full blown argument. "What the hell does "fine" mean, huh?"

I bring this up because, I think many times as bloggers we tend to project "voice" or "tone" into some of the posts and/or comments we read. A perfect example -- it appears that MIM has unintentionally been pissin' off all the fat people out there (just kidding) and she's been getting attacked from every side (hello people, it's a blog.... if you don't like the topic, don't read it!) In some ways, I think she made a big mistake by just posting a couple of thoughts rather than a 750 page dissertation of all the reasons why people gain/lose weight, why people may or may not get depressed and why spouses may/may not mind when their partner balloons up after marriage. Why people can't just take it as food for thought, I don't know -- she has some great arguments -- which are just that...... arguments, theories.... not the rule of law (she's good, she's not that good). I don't agree with everything that she wrote -- but it was thought provoking none the less and made me stop and think about the health of my own body-image and the motivations behind it.

Anyway, the Big Dubya thought he was being a good guy and posted a comment..... intending to throw her some support -- when what he actually ended up doing was insulting the author of a blog that we both really enjoy reading. I'm so glad she got in touch with him -- apparently, what he meant and what he typed were not in the same galaxy at all... and he implored her to remove the comment before he insulted anyone else we like! (Husbands, they just shouldn't be left alone). Anyway MIM was, as always, very gracious -- she removed the post, and accepted his apology -- hopefully we are all good and the international incident was avoided.

The moral of the story.... let's be careful how what we type might be received, 'kay?

Too Cool.....

Our 'lil man has decided that after several months of loving being in his excersaucer..... he's too cool for the inside.... yeah, all he wants to do is walk around the outside.

Sniff, he's getting so grown up.

Adam, how could you do it?

As a sports fan, I'm fairly loyal to a few teams.... my parents came to the United States in the late '60s and their first real exposure to American sports were the '69 Mets. My mother talks of being amazed by the ticker-tape parade and the people of New York celebrating in the street. After moving to the Boston area in the late '70s, my mother became a RedSox fan.... my Dad, he stayed loyal to the Mets. The fall of 1986 was tense in our house....... but we survived.

My Dad took us to a few RedSox games and we got to see the many of the greats play..... I remember him saying that when I grew up, I'd be able to say that I saw Yaz play. That was back when it wasn't all that unusual for a player to spend their entire career with one team.... I think that time has passed.

As fans, we expect the players to be as loyal to their team as we are..... but for them, it's a job -- they are loyal to the team that pays them..... whatever team that happens to be. Cognitively I understand that.... and seeing one player or another depart the home team..... I don't always like it, but it's a fact of life. But some players..... some players you just expect more from.... you expect them to always be there..... when they leave, it's personal.

Which brings me to Adam Vinatieri.... how could he leave us???

Let's make a list of the things I can't do....

Okay, I'm sure I've gone on enough about the mouse.... which still hasn't been caught by the way -- so, instead, I thought I'd highlight one of my shortcomings.....

I cannot fold a fitted sheet..... yes, for some reason, I am unable to learn this task -- which sounds absurdly simple. By the way, apparently I'm not alone -- as I searched for this picture, I found several websites claiming that they could teach me how to accomplish this feat..... who'd a thunk it? what did we do before the internet, huh?

There are many, many more of course, but..... wanna share what you can't do?

Sunday at the Dubyas

11:30 am

Mrs Big Dubya: Honey, wanna beer?
Mr Big Dubya: No, I think I'm all set for now
Mrs Big Dubya (to 'lil Dubya): No sweetie -- Daddy's not a Mary -- Honey, did you teach him that?

Disclaimer: The 'lil man's teething and has kept us up all night for three days..... time of day in our house is irrelevant at this point in time.

I'm being stalked

Okay -- so, I know..... enough about the mouse, but.....

All the traps are empty... it's been over a week. The Big Dubya saw the 'lil bastard on Friday night, but he got away.... we set more traps, but still nothing -- enough already!

So, Saturday, we took the 'lil man to get his 9-month photos done.... I know, picture overkill, but my plan is 3 mos, 6, mos, 9 mos, 1 year, 18 mos, 2 years and then annually after that...... it's just that they just change so much during this first year. I was recalling his 6-month photo session and that he couldn't really sit up on his own.... several boppys were involved in keeping him upright. Here we are, barely 3 months later and he's standing (with the help of a stool of course, but.... standing people!)

We went to the photo place and the 'lil man slept in the car -- when we woke him up he had huge red cheeks and was drooling like water-works, but..... such is life with a teething baby. We got inside and the photographers that work with children are great -- so patient. She got some great shots -- so, we were going over them -- trying to decide what to buy (by the way, black & white remedies much of the red cheek issue -- but doesn't do much for the drool) when a mouse ran right by where we were sitting. HELLOOOO -- what the fuck did I do to the mouse gods, huh? what's next? my car? my office? huh?

Tales of an amateur photo shoot....

So, my parents are right off the boat from Ireland.... our child has a very Irish name (FYI the 'lil Dubya is really just a pseudonym). As a result, I decided to take a St Patrick's Day photo of my 'lil man in his Irish gear..... easier said than done.

The results:

We'll try again later, but in the meantime -- Happy St Patrick's Day!

The Internet.... a blessing? or a curse?

A few years ago, my little Irish mother came to me and said "teach me dot-coms, I want to learn dot-coms" -- apparently she'd been hearing a lot about the internet and email and she wanted to join the fun.

In some ways it was great, it opened up a whole new world to her.... she started emailing her sisters and old friends that she'd lost touch with. Aunt P and I bought her a computer for Christmas and she started monitoring the stock market.... she selects stocks and follows them religiously.... she doesn't buy them, but she keeps an eye on all the prices..... she gets excited when they go up, sad when they go down..... she emails us regularly and I send her pictures of the 'lil man.... all this is terrific.

The problem is the junk..... you know, the chain letters, the jokes, the stuff we all categorize as spam..... this is my mother's bread & butter. Not a day goes by that she doesn't send me some sort of joke or cartoon -- granted, this is a little annoying -- but the part that is really funny is that most of the stuff she sends is smut. That's right -- my little Irish mother sends me dirty, dirty, filthy emails..... AND she sends it to my husband too! She's even taken to sending this crap to my in-laws UGGGGHHHHH.

To add insult to injury.... most of the time, she's so naive and innocent -- she doesn't even understand the joke -- but she likes to be part of the fun, so...I suppose it's harmless.

This is was in today's somewhat vanilla batch....

EEEEEEEK! (Part III)

Okay..... so here we are.... 97 hours since the last critter sighting..... and.... still nothing.... all the traps are empty..... UGGGHHHHH

I apologize for the vulgar language used in my last post.... I like to think that it's atypical..... I don't like to let that side of me slip out..... I've been making an effort to clean up my language, apparently -- I haven't been all that successful..... but, I've got a 9 month old baby who loves to play, lie and/or roll-around on the floor.... and for the past 97 hours, I have not wanted him down there. The only thing that gets me more freaked than the fact that a mouse may or may not be living in my house.... is the thought of that fucking thing getting anywhere near my precious little boy.

Okay.... anyway -- the traps are still empty -- and on some level that should make me happy..... but no, I'm just pissed off..... all the time.

I'm paranoid -- I'm constantly thinking that I see something, or hear something -- but it's a shadow, or a sheet of paper, or the ice shifting in a glass of water. The Big Dubya has been very kind during my hysteria..... he pretends that I'm not being over the top, but I know it.... I am.....he knows it too. I've even gone so far as to make him inspect my shoes before I put them on.... I've heard mice like to live in or burrow in shoes.

EEEEEEEK! (Part II)

So, here we are.... Saturday morning.... roughly 40 hours since the last sighting, and..... the traps are still vacant. Part of me is relieved.... if the traps are still vacant, that must mean that there's only one.... maybe two......, or maybe there was one, and he left.... they can do that, right? Hey you, stop laughing -- You just shut the fuck up, this is how my logic works and I'm not in the mood for your pin-head comments ass face.

But the other part of me is saying...."the fucking traps are still fucking empty.... that fucking little bastard is still running around my god-damned house!"

I'm jittery.... I'm constantly thinking that I see something, but.... it's nothing..... I think I need a tranquilizer.

EEEEEEEK!

I was shocked to see that the topic of Big Dubya's post was the 'lil guys simulated sex thrusts, rather than our new tenant.... the one that doesn't pay rent and is very, very, very unwelcome. Yes, last night while I was sitting on the couch tapping away on this very laptop, I let out a shriek that is usually reserved for cartoon damsels. I saw a mouse scurry across our kitchen.

I swear to God dear readers, our house can get cluttered from time to time, but it is not -- I repeat it is not dirty...... Aunt P, Cape Buffalo..... they'll vouch for me, they've been here. But, I know what you are thinking..... it's the first thing I think of when I hear about mice, or bugs.... I think the house must be dirty. In reality, we just live in a rural area -- so these types of things are to be expected from time to time..... but it is UNACCEPTABLE!

So, I'm sitting on the couch and I see the 'lil buggar..... I screamed.... and then I screamed some more.... the 'lil man was asleep on the couch next to me..... I scared him..... the Big Dubya was upstairs, but came running.... I scared him too. Of course by the time he got to me, the rascal was gone.... gone where? I don't know.... just gone. The Big Dubya ran to Stop & Shop and got some traps..... while he was gone, I called Aunt P...... hoping to distract myself..... but while on the phone with her.... I saw him again...... this time he ran to the fireplace.

The Big Dubya got home and set the traps -- and so we went to bed. This morning, all the traps were vacant...... and as you know, I work from home on Fridays. The Big Dubya left for work and I hid upstairs for as long as I could...... but at some point I had to come downstairs.... the 'lil man needed to be fed.

There have been no more sightings.... the Big Dubya checked the traps again when he got home and nothin'..... so, now we wait.