April 9, 2007

Are there Cliff Notes for this?

So, the other day the 'lil man started gesturing that he wanted to go into the bathroom -- this is where we change his diaper -- so I assumed that he was telling me that he needed to be changed. I asked him "Did you poop?" and he said "yes" so we went into the bathroom.
I put him up on the changing pad, checked his diaper and discovered that it was both clean and dry -- so, I joked with him, called him a big faker and sent him on his way. Two minutes later, he's in the corner grunting.....

DURRRRR Mrs Big Dubya, he wasn't telling you that he HAD pooped, he was telling you that he HAD TO poop.... well gee, that never happened before.... how exciting!

I know he's young and that this might pass, but several times in the past week he's indicated that he needed use the bathroom and he's exhibited similar behavior at daycare where some of the older kids are currently in the throws of potty-training. But, I don't know what to do -- I was always under the impression that kids (particularly boys) don't do this until much later.... he's only 22 months and although I'd be thrilled to leave the diaper days behind us, I've read no books on the subject..... I find myself desperate for the Cliffs Notes version... or at the very least Potty Training for Dummies.

Yesterday he asked again -- we went into the bathroom and I sat him up on the toilet -- yes, okay now I know how stupid that was, he almost fell in.
After that unsuccessful outing, I went to BabiesRUs.com to see what they had in the potty category..... oh dear. I had no idea there were so many options --

Okay, so dear readers -- HELP!!!!!

What books/products/methods have you used/found success with? And, do little boys train sitting down? and move to standing up? or do they stand from the get-go?


jackie said...

I'm in the same boat as you. my lil guy started telling us he needed to go around the same age. Any time we'd take him to one of the three different potties he'd either say "no potty" or sit there and say "it's stuck." So far there have been no successful deposits and he's gotten to the point that he doesn't say anything until after he is stinky.

I don't know what to do either. So far I have gotten him a seat that goes on the toilet and a little tikes potty and a baby bjorn potty. The baby bjorn one is the one we have had the most success getting him to sit on. It's also the one we have had baby sister use for the occasional infant potty training experiment. So far, at only 3 months of age, her potty successes out number her brother 3 to 0.

Brandi said...

What worked for us in the beginning was to let her run around bottomless. Panties screwed her up because she thought they were absorbent. It took a good while, and a few accidents, for her to figure out that it was uncomfortable when she pees in the panties. We started potty training about 4 months ago, and she's all the way housebroken now, but I'm still scared to venture out of the house with her in just panties.

Oh, we just use the cushion that goes over the toilet seat. I bought a "potty" about a year ago, but when it came time to actually train her I didn't want to have to clean that thing.

Kara said...

I can't even pretend to say I know how to potty train a boy... but I do know that daycare is the best for potty training though. Ask his teachers what they recommend so you can have some continuity between school and home. His teachers have, no doubt, trained dozens of kids. He sees the bigger kids using the potty (since virtually every center in the world has the kids use the potty with the door open) and wants to imitate them to which I say SCORE!

Karen S. said...

I was very frustrated as well with potty training. When I was researching potty training a common theme seemed to be praise and positive reinforcement. I came across a website called www.pottytrainingrewards.com. We hung it in the kitchen and named the little boy on the front of the package, Bobby. My son could not wait to go to the potty so he could push the button, hear the praising message, and get his chocolate reward from, Bobby. It really got my son excited about using the potty himself and it was fun for him. Because he became so involved, potty training was easy. So give it a try. Good Luck!

Above Average Joe said...

For The Champ, we threw a couple of Cheerios into the bowl and told him to fire at will.

Mamacita Tina said...

Ian is now 33 months, and shows little sign he wants to be potty trained, sigh. We've started the process, he's fighting it.

I would recommend a potty that goes onto the big toilet and a step stool so his feet aren't dangling. We unfortunately didn't think about it, and have to clean the little potty out every time he uses it, YUCK!

I think Kara's advice is smart, do what day care is doing.

Good luck. Share anything brilliant you come across, we're getting desperate over here.

Jenn said...

Not sure if you ever read Issa's World, but she had the Natzi Potty Training post up. Her blog is down, but I believe someone else reposted it, lets see.

ok this is long (and seems a bit harsh), but I'll paste it here. I havn't used this yet, but it comes highly recomended:

NAZI POTTY TRAINING - this is a four day process. Be prepared and be scared.

1. First off, your kid has to be ready. Yes, I mean them, not you. I don't care if it is your goal to have them potty trained by a certain date for whatever reason...school, new baby...it never works unless they are ready. My general rule of thumb is this, if they tell you when they just pooped and ask you to change them. Or they do all their bidness in a corner and then come hang out right near you, cause they know you'll change them, then they are ready. Also, they must be able to communicate with you to a certain degree. Nata stands in a corner when she poops, but will not come and tell me. When I ask, she says, nopes, no poopy. But she giggles. So I know she is close. Do it on a week when you can be at home with them. Or a long weekend.

2. Go buy little underwears with your kids favorite cartoon character on them and jelly beans. If your kid likes something else more than jelly beans, go for that instead. I don't do chocolate, just cause it seems mean to only give them one M&M. But that's just me. I mean Nazi, sure. But I'm not heartless.

3. DO NOT BUY PULL-UPS. This is very important. There is no place for these dam things in Nazi Potty Training. They are a waste of time and they ruin the process. It is still a diaper. Just one that leaks after a while.

4. Buy those little kid seat dealys that fit over the regular seat cover. It eliminates you cleaning out a bitty potty and in my professional opinion, it works better and faster. Kids get that we pee in the potty. They generally like the idea of doing what we do. Why the hell should we buy a different version of what we already own? The little seat will first of all teach them to use a real toilet without falling in and second, make it not a toy. This is important, toilets are not toys.

5. Go cold turkey. No more diapees. Yes, I know this is harsh, but it works wonders. Then there is no confusion. But please for the love of all things sane, warn them for a few days before hand. Talk about being big and using the potty like mommy and daddy.

6. The first morning, put them in underwears. Let them help you put a stool in front of the potty and the little seat thing on. Explain to them that now they are big and they need to use the potty and not pee or poop in the underwears. Tell them to let you know when they need to pee and if they do you will give them a jelly bean. Show them the bag of jelly beans. The first day ask them if they need to go every 20 minutes. Make them try at least once an hour. If they pee even the teeniest bit in the potty, give them two jelly beans. Two is important, cause they are generally two at this point and they understand that two is important. When/if they have an accident, stop everything to change them, no matter what. Don't make a big deal of the mess, but tell them, oh when you don't pee/poop in the potty, we have to stop everything we are doing. Trust me, they won't want that. Continue this for two days. If you have a stubborn child like mine, you will have a hard time getting them in a diaper for sleeping. Either put the underwears over it or really go cold turkey and put a plastic sheet under their sheets. This is what I did for Maya.

7. In the following two days, you will see improvement. They will want those jelly beans, I promise. If you are against candy, go with stickers. If you have a hard headed child, do both. Whatever works. You will be doing a lot of cleaning up that first day. Sorry, it has to be done. They will quickly learn that they hate being wet and having to be changed so often. Oh also, after you change them, make them sit on the potty again, even though you know they won't do something. It makes a point.

8. The third day, take your show on the road. Pack one and ONLY ONE pair of extra clothes and underwears. Go to the store or Target and out to eat. Remind them that if they pee int he clothes, they will have to be changed. Go to the park or the zoo. Do something fun. Kids like to check out new potties. As often as you can stand it, make them try to pee in a regular potty. I know it is gross. Some people take the little seat deal with them. I just held mine up. The first time they have an accident (if they do) change them. Make them try to use the potty. Warn them a few times that next time, you will have to go home, cause you have no more clothes. Please continue to do things. If they don't pee, great....but if you are still having a lot of accident in general, you almost need to wait until they have one again. It makes a point. They hate having to leave places, especially the park.

9. The forth day is the most crucial day. Take them somewhere they love, even if it is "Parental Hell" (Chucky Cheese) and you hate it. Warn them that you brought no underwears and no extra clothes. Tell them if they do not come to you and tell you when they need to pee and they have an accident, you will be going home, even if they are not ready. When you get there, make them use the bathroom. Ask them a bunch of times, cause it will not be fun to make them leave. Remind them nicely about the leaving policy. If they have an accident, leave immediately. They will most likely scream and throw a fit. Ignore it. Take the long way home. Keep you music up loud if they are screaming. If they are not screaming, tell them how sorry you are that you had to leave and remind them why it happened. Ask them to tell you how uncomfortable it is to be wet or poopy and to have to sit in it.

10. At this point, you should have a mostly potty trained kid. I did with Maya and five others. Go about your normal routine. Keep reminding them to use the potty, I mean they are toddlers. But by this point, most kids will come and tell you a lot of the time. Keep up the jelly beans or stickers for a week or two, but start to phase it out. Go down to one jelly bean and then start telling them, next time.

11. Have a drinking party for you yourself and um...me. :) You deserve it. Congratulations. Now make them get a job. Just kidding. If you have questions, let me know

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