Let's take a break from all the baby waiting posts....

Yeah, I've got a dr's apt this afternoon -- two of them actually, but..... for now, let's go on baby- waiting hiatus, shall we? I think we need the break...

I am not a "reality TV" fan..... I've never seen an episode of Survivor, I've never watched American Idol..... but for some reason, I find Dancing with the Stars to be very entertaining. I started watching one day when the 'lil man was small -- ABC Family ran a marathon of the first season and I got hooked -- I've even got the Big Dubya watching now -- granted, he's watching because of me.... and might not watch if I wasn't around, but as he puts it -- the women.... well, they aint hard to look at.

Anyway, lately the recently ousted contestant Monique Coleman has been on all the talk shows.... Larry King, The View, etc. I didn't care for Monique much when she was on the show -- I thought she was a bit too full of herself -- always going on and on about how her routines were harder and had more complexity than those of the other contestants and how the judges were harder on her than the others....Blah, blah, blah...... I mean, seriously -- you are 26 years old..... competing against 62 year old Jerry Springer..... give me a break! Even when she was given good feedback by the judges, she managed to be less than gracious.

On these talk shows, she got worse -- she went on to say that the hardest part of being on the show was protecting her image -- apparently she considers herself a "role model" to millions of young women and she needed to make sure she wasn't projecting anything negative.

HUH? a role model? I wanted to smack her and let her know that she's been famous for 4½ minutes..... a role model? Does she know she's sitting next to the legendary Emmitt Smith -- an actual role model, who managed to be a gentleman and a good sport without proclaiming himself a role model?

Is that how it works now.... you say you are a role model and POOF you become one?

Okay -- so let's move on..... because I'm kinda curious now.

What part of her image was she "protecting" -- HMMMMM,

She seemed like a sore loser to me when she complained that her dances were harder and that her scores didn't reflect that.....

She seemed like a show-off when she insisted on doing some sort of solo dance at the beginning of one of her numbers.....

She seemed a bit immodest when she donned really revealing costumes..... in fairness, all the costumes are on the skimpy side and that's fine, but...... if she was really worried about young girls, isn't that an area where she could choose to make a statement? -- maybe opt to cover-up a bit more than the others?

I'm wondering -- What exactly did ABC ask her to do that she felt wasn't consistent with this precious "image" she's dreamed up for herself.

Slip of the tongue?

So..... our pregnancy saga continues.

Thankfully, everything is okay. We went for an ultrasound yesterday (the doctor's office variety, not the Tom & Katie kind) and from what could be seen..... the 'liller Dubya is healthy and a good size -- indicating that my high blood pressure has not had any adverse effects.

Of course, this is a huge load off of our minds and now we just wait...... and wait...... and wait some more.

I go back to the doctor tomorrow for some more tests....... but, even if something happens..... we are past 37 weeks and it looks like the baby is fine to be delivered...... so, all together now.... PHEW!

I couldn't help but notice, the doctor saying "his" when showing us the tiny diaphragm pulsating...... the Big Dubya picked up on it too. He's a pretty "old school" type doctor -- so, he may have just been generalizing..... he's done that before, he's explained to me that he does that so as to not let the cat out of the bag -- but yesterday, there was no disclaimer, no explanation...... he just said "his" did he forget we don't konw what we are having?

In any event, I think this is the first time in weeks that I've even considered that this baby could be a boy. I mean, people have been telling me..... and I mean everybody from the woman at the cafeteria at work, the old ladies at Stop & Shop, Aunt P, everybody.... for months that this baby is a girl. I'm not sure if it's the power of persuasion or the constant repetition, but I had just kind of bought into the belief that this baby's a girl.... and now, the doctor says "his" at the ulatrasound..... is this anohter 'lil boy?

I've said it all along -- it would be wonderful to have another little boy..... the 'lil Dubya would have a baby brother, a best friend..... I already have all the boy "stuff"..... it would be great. Then again, a little girl would be nice too -- it would be different, we'd have one of each..... every baby is a blessing -- so, I honestly do not care what it is....... as long as he/she's happy and healthy..... and who are we kidding????.... a good sleeper would certainly sweeten the deal.

Oh well, time will tell

Stay tuned!

It's a shame the doctor's office doesn't have a frequent flier program

So, yesterday morning I got to go back to the doctor AGAIN.... yes, I'm going every third day now. This was to be my usual weekly appointment -- you may recall that at my regularly scheduled appointment last Friday, my blood pressure was too high and it kicked off a series of blood work and quite a bit of stealth peeing. I got to visit the office again on Tuesday, and although my blood pressure was still too high, it had stabilized somewhat..... putting us in a holding pattern and that brings us to yesterday.

Well, yesterday's reading was the highest they've seen to date (well, for this pregnancy anyway -- I'm still quite a bit away from the 250/167 reading that kicked off the 'lil Dubya's birth via emergency c-section 17 months ago). So, I got to head to the hospital for yet another panel of blood work (okay guys, I'm starting to feel like a pincushion) and I'm having an ultrasound and fetal stress test at 8:00 Monday morning. I've been instructed to continue checking my BP every few hours and to report to the hospital if there are any notable spikes... of course, I had to wonder what the doctor was thinking when he said "so, I'll see you Monday -- if not sooner" He tends to be one of those strong silent types, so I had to wonder if he's just assuming I won't last 'til Monday...... or if it was a lame attempt at humor. I guess we'll know soon enough.

My "official" due date is December 2nd, (3 weeks from today)..... so, I consider myself extremely fortunate that the baby is almost full term and could be safely delivered any time now if necessary -- there are lots of people who have this kind of thing happen much earlier in their pregnancies and therefore, there babies are in jeopardy...... so, it's really snarky of me to be making light of the situation..... But, good God all this uncertainty is stressful. I mean, every time I go to the doctor's office I have to wonder..... "Is this the time they tell me to go to the hospital? is this the day they tell me I have to stop going to work?"

Granny (my mother) calls every day to ask how I'm feeling and if I'm "puffed", because when I had toxemia & HELLP syndrome with my last pregnancy, the condition was accompanied by a severe case of swelling..... I'm talking about some serious bloat! So, she has to inquire every f*ing day about my level of "puffiness". But, let's be serious people, when you're 9 mos pregnant you are gonna retain some fluid and look a bit puffy..... that's just the way it goes!

Aunt P is going to come help out with the 'lil man when I finally go to the hospital.... so she's now driving around with her overnight bag in her car -- just in case she needs to get here in a hurry. And, like everyone else -- every time I go to the doctor, she's surprised that I really have no new delivery-date-related information to report..... just more tests for me..... and we'll see what happens.

So, we wait......

By the way -- WE STILL HAVE NO NAMES!

Election Day Reflections

No folks, this isn't the typical political rant -- so, don't turn away just yet.....

I was feeling like I was in a blogging funk..... hmmmm, what to post about..... lately, all I've done is complain, bitch and moan about being nine months pregnant -- big and awkward with high blood pressure. People are kind, but they'll only read that kind of stuff for so long (no matter how wittily written) before they label you a whiner and start reading somebody else.

I've been tagged for a couple of memes -- and I will, I promise, I will post those -- once I can string together some coherent thoughts.... I'm always paranoid that my answers will disappoint people..... the truth is, I'm pretty boring..... answering all those questions may let the cat out of the bag. So in the meantime, Insurance Mom gave me an idea -- so, here it goes.

A lot of families have things that they do together..... you've heard the saying "the family that prays together, stays together" or some derivation of it..... growing up, there was always that family in the neighborhood that had "movie night" or some other activity that they all did together -- I always thought it was nice.

My family...... well, ours was a bit different -- we always voted together.

My parents are immigrants, they came here from Ireland in the late 1960s -- my mother became a citizen in the early '70s, but my Dad didn't take his oath until I was in high school (yes, he was a LEGAL alien for close to 20 years). It would have been a cool thing to see -- your Dad being sworn in as an American citizen..... but he wouldn't let us go with him -- instead, he went by himself -- he maintained that it was a very personal thing and didn't want/need an audience.... he's an odd duck.... I'm still disappointed that we didn't get to see it.

Being naturalized citizens, my parents take voting very seriously -- we'll ignore the fact that they always get reprimanded for going into each other's booth in a desperate attempt to recollect who'd they'd decided to vote for for park commissioner. They love being Americans and consider it one of the greatest choices that they made for their children..... they chose to build their lives here.

So as it happened, in 1992 -- my Dad and I were able to vote in our first presidential election together. My parents and I trotted off to the polls -- and so the tradition began. A couple of years later, Aunt P joined -- and then uncle Ro-ro. For a while, we used to vote before work.... then, when Uncle Ro-ro turned 21 -- we'd go vote and then hit the pub for a pint.

The election monitors (old ladies that check your ID) always remarked how lovely it was that we always arrived to vote together. It was a nice tradition, and now that I live in another state.... it's one that I miss.

I voted on my way to the doctor's office yesterday morning -- I wanted to make sure that I had voted.... just in case the doctor had baby-delivery plans for me (he didn't) -- I didn't want to miss my chance. On my way out, some kid holding a sign thanked me for voting -- it kind of seemed absurd to me. Voting is a privilege -- people fight and die for this privilege -- in some countries, women aren't allowed to vote -- wouldn't it be disrespectful not to vote?

I'm no fan of politics..... too much time, energy and way too much money is spent on ridiculous campaigns -- money that could be spent on feeding people, teaching children to read and on curing disease -- but, democracy is beautiful -- it's flawed of course, but beautiful and the only way to make change is to vote.

Thud!

That was me hopping off my soapbox!

Today's update..... it's just pissa

So, as previously reported..... I went to the doctor this morning. It was to be a routine pre-natal check up -- those who've been there know the drill...... they listen to the heartbeat, you get weighed (UGH, that's the worst!!) and measured.... you get your blood pressure and urine checked, and then you make an appointment for next week and are sent on your merry way.

Well.... that is unless you've got a history of HELLP syndrome and your blood pressure is running higher than it should be.... then the visit becomes a tiny bit less routine.

To begin with, you get sent to the lab for a "precautionary" full panel of bloodwork.... your next appointment isn't next week, it's Tuesday..... so they can re-check your blood pressure. You get strict instructions to report to the hospital immediately if your blood pressure (which you are now checking at home several times a day) exceeds a certain level and you are given a prescription for Albustix -- strips that enable you to monitor the proteins found in your urine at home.

You also learn that if your condition continues to "deteriorate" you may have to have an amnio and possibly have the baby delivered early. Well HOOOORAAAAYYYY -- if my BP wasn't up already, it sure was after hearing all that.

Okay, there is no benefit in stressing over any of this -- just take it easy and see what happens, right? Yeah, easier said than done -- but we're working on it.

So, the Big Dubya picks up my RX for me..... apparently, these strips are over-the-counter, so my insurance won't cover them -- meaning that it's not a $10 co-pay, I've got to cough up the full retail price of $47.79 -- kind of absurd to drop $50 on tiny pieces of paper I'm just going to pee on, but hey, what are you gonna do?

Here is where things get really stupid..... the directions that come with these very expensive and soon to be peed on strips. I mean, I'm one of these people that think having directions on a shampoo bottle is absurd -- but these, these directions take the cake.

Directions: 1. Dip reagent end of strip in FRESH, well-mixed, uncentrifuged urine and remove immediately. (Alternatively, wet reagent area of the strip by passing through urine stream.)

Mrs Big Dubya's commentary: UMMMMMM, did we need to capitalize FRESH? And, while we are on the word "FRESH".... what do other people do? keep stale cups of urine just lying around? and what do they it mean by well-mixed? like swish it around in the cup? or am I supposed to pee into a blender? and did they really need to exclude centrifuged urine? I mean, doesn't everyone run their pee through a centrifuge????

I'm not going to subject you all to the remaining steps included in these directions..... other than to let you know that there's some great advice on how "to prevent possible soiling of hands with urine". Apparently, there are lots of people who can't manage to dip a piece of paper into a cup of urine without soiling themselves.

I had also hoped to get my c-section appointment this morning -- but given recent developments, they are going to hold off scheduling it until they know my blood pressure is under control.....

So, how was your day?

Try not to panic folks...

Okay -- so here we are...... 30 days away from our official due date of December 2nd..... and it's hard not to be a little on edge.

To begin with, the 'lil Dubya was delivered 5 weeks early -- hence, I've never been 36 weeks pregnant before...... so all the apprehension reserved for first-timers rests firmly on me now as I await the arrival of #2. The night the 'lil man arrived.... I didn't know what was going to happen to me -- I went to the hospital with chest pains for God's sake -- a baby? I wasn't going to have a baby -- I was gonna get laughed at by a bunch of L&D nurses, given some antacid and sent home..... at least that's what I thought. Once we were there I quickly learned I'd be staying a few days -- that's when the drugs kicked in and it all gets blurry.

This go around, we are getting "scheduled". It sounds so ridiculous..... I mean, I'm not one of those people that wants to "pencil-in" the birth of my child. I didn't want to go the c-section route again -- the recovery is long and painful and although I know doing it the old fashioned way is no picnic, it's also not major abdominal surgery. But, given all the crap that happened the last time -- every doctor I've spoken to (and there have been many) has advised me not to risk it -- so, tomorrow morning I go to the doctor and I'll be given my "appointment" which will eventually convert to my child's birthday.

Now, here's where the wrinkle lies..... my due date is Saturday, December 2nd. The doctor's office tends to schedule deliveries for one-week-prior to the due date -- but, being a Saturday -- that puts us at Friday, November 25th...... yeah, it's the day after Thanksgiving. The doctor said he'd have to see what the schedule was like -- but if it's not the day after Thanksgiving and they back it up a few days..... does that mean I'm spending my Thanksgiving in the hospital?? I mean, it really doesn't matter to me -- it's not exactly my favorite holiday and what better to be thankful for than a new baby, but..... gee whiz..... Thanksgiving in the hospital..... not really what I imagined.

Oh well, I suppose we'll find out tomorrow -- won't we?

So, there I am standing in WalMart with a palm full of vomit...

Okay, it's been printed here on more than one occasion that I have some snobby tendencies and that, in general, I don't like people.

So, if I have to go to a place like WalMart on a weekend, it's very likely that I'll do it first thing in the morning.... like when they first open -- simply so I can avoid "the element" and the frustration that they cause me. At 7:00 am the store is relatively empty and I can get in and out without wanting to open up a social services kiosk.

Look, I think people should be able to raise their kids anyway they want (within reason of course), and I'm sure that my parenting tactics may seem odd to some..... however...... if they want to tell their whining toddler to "shut the fuck up" I would prefer that I not be subjected to it -- because in my tiny little mind using that kind of language in that kind of tone is abuse and I don't want to bear witness to such behavior.

So, the 'lil man and I headed to WalMart this morning -- I needed to get the Halloween candy and a couple of other items. We got there and he was in a great mood -- he got a real kick out of running from the car to the store in the rain. He loves to smile at all the shoppers & employees -- and in someway it's nice that he's able to make their day -- because he really is enough to turn their "I'm at WalMart at 7:00am" scowl into a smile.

He's been teething something fierce the past few days -- he's cutting some really big molars and as a result, he puts everything in his mouth -- this time, it was his entire fist in an effort to let his little fingers massage his gums. Then I heard it.... poor 'lil guy gagged himself and it started to erupt. It's instinct I guess..... you cup your hand and you try to catch it...... but then what? The parenting books do not cover this..... he's startled and has vomit all done his jacket and you've only got one free hand to deal with and/or contain the mess.

In some ways, being in WalMart is a blessing -- where better than a place that sells the cleaning supplies? So, I headed for the paper towels -- and then thought "NO, Mrs Big Dubya -- use your head..... this is a job for babywipes!" I won't even start in on how I'm awed by our parents who raised us in a pre-baby wipe era...... so I went to the baby aisle and busted open a package of baby wipes. We were able to get ourselves back to a presentable condition, grabbed the candy and got back on the road home.........

Such is Saturday morning in casa Dubya....

Don't believe the hype

About a month…maybe six weeks ago…. I got an email from Aunt P – she’d gotten wind of a survey that if you filled it out, you could get a free Senseo machine.

Of course I laughed at her and told her that she’d been sold a bill of goods – those things are always a farce. Initially she thought the same thing, but upon completion of the survey, she got notification that she qualified for the free machine and that it was being shipped. Additionally, Mr. Tall Guy also qualified – his machine was also on its way. I’d had no experience with Senseo, but I’d heard great things about the Tassimo and Keurig machines – so I assumed this would be just as good….. I figured what the heck, I’ll fill out the survey too. And, for good measure – I forwarded it to the Big Dubya too.

A few days later, I had heard nothing – but the Big Dubya received notification that he qualified and that his free coffee machine had shipped. I’m not so sure what the hell is wrong with me…. Did I not answer the questions well???? Why was I the only one of the four of us that didn’t warrant a free coffee machine. I won’t pretend that I wasn’t upset – I was – but at least we were getting one…. And it was free.

It’s a very convenient and clever concept – brew just the amount of coffee you want….. fresh, when you want it – no clean up – I like it. I told the Big Dubya that if we were really pleased and found that we got good use of it – maybe we would upgrade to one of the higher-end brands (Tassimo/Keurig)….. but this would be a great way to determine whether or not this set up was for us.

Well, the Big Dubya’s coffee machine arrived with some sample coffee – let me tell you, to say that the coffee tasted like ass would be generous. I could have gotten more enjoyment out of a cup of the ‘lil Dubya’s bathwater. The Big Dubya and I assumed that it must just be that they sent us bad sample coffee….. but no, we tried other flavors…. Vienna, Cappuccino, Paris…… to put it simply they all just sucked.

I checked with Aunt P….. she said her coffee sucked too – but if you put a tea bag in, it does yield a decent cup of tea. And her machine was BLUE..... and Mr Tall Guys was BLACK..... at least ours was an inconspicuous white. I’m wondering if this is the company’s sly way of getting people to by their crap coffee….. send them a free machine in an obnoxious color and then send them out to buy all the various coffee pods in a desperate attempt to get it to produce something decent.... or at least drinkable.

I dunno….. at least it was free…. And, now I don’t feel so bad about not getting one anymore.

Give ‘em an inch, and they’ll take…….

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know – I asked for it.

A week or so ago, I was corresponding with the Big Dubya’s famous (infamous?) best-bud (known here in blogland as 39).

See, I have a theory that every “married with child(ren)” type guy has a 39 in his life. 39’s the guy who’s been with you since grade school…. seen you through thick & thin…… he’s one of the family. He’s the guy that hasn’t settled down (hell, he may never settle down), and he manages to simultaneously make you long for your "young and frisky" days while also making you really, really grateful that those days are behind you.

Anyway, 39 mentions this other guy (who I am not a fan of by the way) is having a “fire on Saturday night”… it sounds kind of dastardly I know, but I know what he means. I gently reminded him that by the time Saturday night rolls around I’ll be 35½ weeks pregnant so, although I really appreciate the info…. I’m clearly not going to partake in the festivities (despite the fact that I really do need a break) – but, hmmmmmm it might be nice to let the Big Dubya cut loose for the night. It’ll be a while before he gets the chance again, and he hasn’t seen these guys in a while…… 39 then reminds me that most wives don’t think this way…. and that my husband is a lucky guy.... I like being known as the "cool wife" -- kinda stupid, I know -- but I like being the one that is low-maintenance and reasonable.... that is, of course, until it bites me in the ass and being "low-maintenance" translates into feeling "neglected, forgotten and taken for granted".

So, at 2:00 on Saturday afternoon the Big Dubya packed his bag and headed off to his party in the woods. My only request was that he kept his cell phone on and accessible….as, I’m 35½ weeks pregnant and home alone (168.7 miles away from “the fire”) with a slightly under-the-weather 16 month old… if I need to get a hold of him in a hurry, I don’t want to be calling all over creation trying to track him down.

You knew it was going to happen (no, thankfully not labor)…. Sometime around 5:30, Granny called to ask if the Big Dubya was going to be eating dinner with them….. they were going out to eat and didn’t want to leave without him, but they also didn’t want to wait if he wasn’t coming. I had no idea what his dinner plans were…… so I called his cell phone....

YEP, I GOT VOICEMAIL!

In fairness, he was visiting his parents and cell phone coverage at Nana & Papa Dubya’s house isn’t so good – so, it’s fine that I got voicemail……. But, I got no return phone call…. There was a vague text message sometime close to 7:00 saying that he arrived safe, but I didn’t get a return phone call.

It wasn’t until 10:00am on SUNDAY that I finally heard from him.

There was no call to see how the ‘lil man was doing…..

There was no, “Hey honey, I’m about to get plowed on micro-brews and Cuban cigars…. so if you need me to come home, better say so now while I can still drive…” call

No, there was no call at all...... nothing.....

Maybe it's the hormones....... I dunno........ it's not even that I'm mad....'cuz I'm not really..... his going to the damn fire was my idea in the first place, but my feelings are pretty hurt.

Shouldn't he have wanted to check-in on us? How is it possible that even good guys fuck-up the easy stuff, huh?

What's more fun than taking your very active 16-month old son to the gynecologist?

How about finding out that your husband took the stroller out of your car (and didn't put it back of course) and realizing that you have no way to restrain the child while you are being examined.

Thank God those urine sample cups are fun to play with!

Happy Friday

It looks like it won't be us...

Yep folks, it appears that the 'liller Dubya will not be the 300 millionth American.... oh well.

The experts refer to it as "nesting"

I on the other hand, think that "freaking the fuck out" is a far better... and more accurate description.

For weeks now, I've been threatening to get all the 'lil Dubya's baby stuff out..... bassinette, bouncy seat, gender-neutral onsies & stretchy suits..... and get it all washed (in Dreft of course) and ready for the arrival of the 'liller Dubya. I asked the Big Dubya to bring the storage bins up from the basement.... and he said he would, when he had a chance.

Well, on Friday -- I went to my regularly scheduled doctor's apt and the doctor noticed my BP was slightly elevated.... no, not high -- no, not dangerous -- no, nothing to worry about..... weight was fine, labs were fine. But, given my history.... he advised that we step up to a weekly schedule and that if I find myself experiencing any type of discomfort -- I shouldn't even bother to call the office -- just go to the hospital and get hooked up to a monitor -- better safe than sorry. No problem...... I've got a BP cuff at home..... I'll keep an eye on it too.

On the ride home it occurred to me that I'm about a week away from where I was when I delivered the 'lil man...... and holy shit, nothing's done. Worse than that -- our house looks like a crime scene. If I were to go into to the hospital to deliver, people would be coming.....to visit, to help w/ the 'lil man...... they can't see this place like this.

I went home and got to work.... I took apart the swing, the bouncy seat, the car seat -- all has now been washed. I cleaned out the 'lil man's closet.... making room for the new-baby stuff that is now making it's way to the washer (my Maytag is getting a workout this weekend). I've started packing my hospital bag -- last time it was all so sudden, there was no bag packed.... and ladies, you have no idea what you'll get if you let your husband just bring you stuff when you are in the hospital........ beer tee-shirt from college was on the list!

As a result of all this panic -- we're in better shape. Don't get me wrong..... we are not "there" yet, but we're getting there.......

I did notice that the woman who just moved in across the street has a cleaning lady come.... something I've been threatening to do for years. I keep saying that I'll hire somebody as soon as I get the house clean enough to let her in to see it.......... hence, nobody's been hired yet -- but we are getting closer. I'm getting serious though, it's even on my Christmas list this year -- I'd love it if someone would just hire me a cleaning service...... Hint, Hint, Hint..... is this thing on?

A bit cranky today....

Not sure why it bothers me, but it really does.......

This morning Granny (my mother) called and got me even more aggravated than I was to begin with. She began the conversation inquiring as to whether or not the Big Dubya had returned from his business trip (the second out-of-state stint in two weeks). I let her know that he had..... then she started singing the praises of the Big Dubya..... it must have been terrible while he was gone..... he's so good, he does so much..... Gee, ya think? Yes, it's harder to manage the 'lil man on my own -- particularly because I'm 8months pregnant -- it's really just the little things that become a challenge.... bending over to give him a bath, carrying him up the stairs -- but, we managed..... lots of women do it all by themselves all the time.

Here's my question -- and probably the line of thinking that makes me an ungrateful bitch..... as, I know that my husband is probably better than most, but......

We BOTH work full-time, we BOTH have demanding jobs...... why shouldn't he do stuff around the house and why shouldn't he be partly responsible for caring for our child (soon to be children). I mean, WE BOTH agreed to buy the house..... WE BOTH prefer to live in a clean house rather than basking in our own filth..... WE BOTH agreed to have children....

But, let's get excessively picking and note my specific and deliberate word-choice here..... because I think it's telling. I didn't say that he "helps" me -- I said that he's "partly responsible" -- You see, Granny thinks that the Big Dubya "helps" me by participating in these activities.......Hmmmmmm, how is caring for OUR child or sweeping the kitchen floor of OUR house "helping" me?

I don't consider doing the weekly food shopping, paying all the bills, staying on top of all the laundry as "helping" him..... I consider it pulling my weight, doing my share of the work -- yet, when the Big Dubya manages to load the dishwasher -- Granny thinks he deserves some sort of trophy. Why is that? Why is giving the 'lil Dubya a bath or washing his bottles considered doing ME a "favor"?

Anyone able to help me see the light..... cuz, I don't get it?

What's big and awkward and can make grown business men come running?

That would be a pregnant woman going ass-over-tea-kettle in the middle of the office...... in this case, Me!

Yep, I managed to avoid falling down when I was pregnant with the 'lil man -- but I took one hell of a digger last Thursday.

It started off simply -- I was sitting at my desk and decided that I needed a red pen. I got up and made my way to the supply cabinet..... I was in our downtown office for the day, that's where the "good" supplies are kept. I selected the red pen I wanted, grabbed a new yellow highlighter for good measure and began the 50-step-walk back to where I was working.... no rocky or uneven terrain -- just industrial the carpet that you'd find in any office-building.

That's when it happened....... my foot just didn't hit the floor right..... my other foot tried in vain to compensate.... my arms flailed out to all sides looking hopelessly for something to grab onto..... there was nothing..... I was going down....... and I was going down hard.

The thoughts running through my head.... Must twist to other side, must not fall on baby....... and then there I was, laying on the ground. I had managed to avoid falling on my stomach..... in the process I beat the living shit out of both my knees, my hands and my ribs (I think from the freakish twisting-to-avoid-the-belly-motion).

I heard shrieks..... no, they weren't mine. A co-worker witnessed the tail-end of the acrobatic-display and then several others rushed from their offices to see what happened. The pain was excruciating..... but the embarrassment was oh, so much worse. I hopped up and deposited myself back into my chair -- hoping everyone would go away before I started bleeding.....

"I'm fine, I'm fine" I promised them all..... as they stood their pale and ashen. "Really, I swear.... I'm fine" and I was.....

Once everyone finally retreated to their offices, I was able to survey the damage -- skinned palms, skinned knee..... oooohhhhh the beginnings of a really, really ugly bruise. The ribs concerned me the most..... they were the closest thing to the baby..... so, I sat quietly -- and waited....... and then the baby moved and I knew that all was fine.

I think I'm gonna wrap myself in bubble-wrap for the next 6 weeks.

EEEEWWWWWW Gross!

As my stomach churned, I really wanted to stop reading..... but I just couldn't -- it just got grosser and more twisted by the minute.... and I was captivated by these sickos.

Anyway, Mr Nice Guy did it to me, so I'm doing it to you......

http://www.browardpalmbeach.com/Issues/2006-09-28/news/feature_full.html

I wanna know!

Generally, this is a Mommy-Blog..... I say generally because sometimes family/work/life issues manage to slip in. In many cases, being a mother touches these issues too -- but it's just not really the focus of this space or why I began blogging to begin with.

That being said, today's post is strictly work-related..... I don't think there's anything mommy-centric here.

I work for a big, well-respected, Fortune 500 Company -- I have I guess what could be called an upper-middle management job. When I attend meetings, I'm often the lowest man on the totem pole, but that's okay because the room is full of the "big-cheeses"..... I'm kinda satisfied that they remember my name from week to week and if I can chime in with something intelligent from time to time -- well, then all the better.

I represent my division on a huge enterprise-wide project -- and on the project I have a colleague that I'll call "Chris" for the purposes of this post. Chris is extremely well thought of -- capable, adds value to every meeting. From what I hear through the grapevine, Chris holds several masters & advanced degrees from very prestigious schools...... yeah, there's a couple of Ivy League names on the old resume.

Here's my dilemma -- I have no idea if Chris is a man or a woman.

Could be a man trying to be a woman..... could be a woman who was just cursed with very man-like attributes.... could be a woman who used to be a man...... I just can't tell. Clearly Chris' current intent is to be a woman..... Chris wears womanly patterns/colors on a very man like build..... something north of 6 feet with broad shoulders, big feet and a deep voice. Ever wonder where these people manage to find women's clothes in men's sizes?

In the grand scheme of things, I suppose it doesn't matter -- Chris is very generous to me on this particular project -- has been helpful and supportive whenever I need him/her to be..... but I find the whole ambiguity somewhat distracting. I worry about saying something insensitive..... I mean, I'm sitting there with my big old pregnant belly and wondering what goes through Chris' head when I walk in the room....

This is not something you can ask around about? I mean -- this is a big company...... HR eats this shit for breakfast..... and even if I could, how could I do it tactfully -- "Hey Mindy, is Chris a really a dude?"

I did broach the topic with one colleague -- I work with him a lot..... I knew if I was vague, he'd know what I meant and be vague right back -- so I asked him

Mrs Big Dubya: Hey Tom, Ever work with Chris?
Tom: Not directly, but..... I know who you mean
Mrs Big Dubya: Oh, I was just wondering what the background was -- seems really accomplished
Tom: Yeah, lots of qualifications -- but I don't know what Chris' story is either.... sorry.

I never realized how attached to the label "man" or "woman" that I am...... I mean, Chris is doing a terrific job -- is more than qualified.....

Why am I so damn curious?

My new look......

Thanks to Hubby for creating my new look......

It's a belated Mother's Day gift, but I think it was well worth the wait :)

Happy Friday Everybody!

PS -- check out Kara -- she's kickin ass and taking names..... and good for her.... blogging was supposed to be fun!

The places I won't buy food

I think every geographical area has their own..... growing up, we had Building 19 and the less-seedy Christmas Tree Shop. In NY, my cousins had Job Lot and various "All-for-A-Dollar" type stores...... (sadly, I remember when they were 69¢ stores.... man am I getting old). Since moving to CT, I've discovered Big Lots.

These stores are terrific -- I love them because they sell the things that I hate spending money on for cheap.... specifically, wrapping paper, gift bags and shower curtain liners. In my little mind, there is nothing worse than having to spend $4.99 on a gift bag for a token gift you spent $12 on. In these shops, gift bags are a buck...... nice (or big) gift bags are a couple of bucks..... you need a bag to stick a bottle of wine in -- $0.69 and you are in business.

These stores have lots of other great stuff too...... and don't you worry -- I'm not kidding myself, I know that they also have lots of junk -- but if you find yourself needing a cheapo plastic table cloth or some clothes pegs -- this is where you go. You may have to battle the old ladies who are spending $3.99 on a some no-name scented candle that they swear will last as long as a Yankee (trust me lady, it won't) -- but it's worth the trip.

But then..... the snob in me comes out. I just can't buy food in these places. I know, a canned good is a canned good and it's in a sealed can so it's probably fine, but...... I just can't do it. I have made two exceptions....... I have purchased Sweet 'n Low and T.G.I Friday's Bloody Mary Mix (it really is the best mix around) at the Christmas Tree Shop...... the price is just too good..... but that's where I draw the line. I can't buy "real" food at these discount stores.... and I can't buy food at the gas station either.... a Diet Coke? sure, but....... one of those pre-made sandwiches from Mobil-On-The-Run..... I'm sorry -- I'll never be that hungry.

He wrote a book?

Okay, so last year..... the day I came back to work..... we got the call.... my granny ('lil Dubya's super-gran) had passed away in Ireland at the ripe old age of 90.

My granddad, her husband had passed away several years earlier -- so there was the matter of disposing of her assets (a.k.a her house). The house is in a gorgeous part of Ireland, but is old and in disrepair -- so the children (my dad, aunts & uncles) agreed that selling it was the only sensible thing to do. As is customary, they waited until she'd been gone a year to put it on the market..... her anniversary was Tuesday and didn't it pop up on the internet on Wednesday.

Anyway, real estate postings are quite different in Ireland -- if you go to www.realtor.com here in the States, you'll get a brief description of the property -- the dimensions of the rooms -- maybe a description of any unique features..... some pricing/tax information.... but that's about it.

In Ireland, the description is a few pages long -- they carefully take you from room to room -- up the stairs, into the closets and give a detailed description of everything right down to the shelves, windows & doors. The same care is given to the yard, the surroundings and..... to the history of the house and those who have lived there.

It was in this description that I learned, my grandfather had authored a book in the late 1940s while living there -- it was one of two books that had been written in the house since it was built. I called Aunt P "Did you know Granddad wrote a book?" -- Nope, she didn't know either. Stupid American that I am, I went and searched for it on Amazon.com...... of course, it's not there. I called Granny "Did you know Granddad wrote a book?" -- Nope, she didn't know..... Dad will surely be aware of this...... "Dad, did you know Granddad wrote a book" Yeah, he knew -- but says that it's been out of print for years -- it's in Gaelic and he's not sure anybody has a copy.

This wasn't good enough for me...... the family needs to have a copy..... I need to be able to pass it down to the 'lil Dubya and the 'liller Dubya that's on the way. My Dad gives up too easy.... he said that I'd never find one -- I suggested Amazon, eBay -- he laughed at me. "No Dad, the internet is amazing for this kind of stuff". Again, he told me the mission was impossible.

I'm not great at internet sleuthing...... The Big Dubya is really busy at work...... this is a job for Aunt P.

-----Original Message-----
From: MrsBigDubya
Sent: Tuesday, September 26, 2006 8:21 AM
To: Aunt P
Cc: MrBigDubya
Subject: By the way.....

I asked Dad about Granddad's book......
He said he wasn't surprised that I couldn't find it on Amazon (seemed amused that I looked) and that it was in Gaelic and out of print.
I told him it would be nice to have a copy in the family...... would be cool if I could get it for him for Christmas

And that was all it took...... she found it within minutes --

One thing I hadn't counted on....

-----Original Message-----
From: Aunt P
Sent: Tuesday, September 26, 2006 9:56 AM
To: MrsBigDubya
Cc: MrBigDubya
RE: By the way.....

Found it!
An irish book store.
For sale. 10 Euros.
I'll see if they'll let me buy it (american credit card and all).
We can give it to Dad for Christmas.

We? Did she say WE??? Did she steal my gift idea right out from under me????

Ever the diplomat, I suggested we give it to him from my kids...... she countered with from my kids and her dog..... SOLD.

Second time around..... not the same ol' thing

I kind of thought that pregnancy the second time around would be different..... and it is...... but not at all for the reasons I thought.

The excitement is similar...... the anticipation is huge...... but, people just aren't as excited for you. I can understand that..... first babies are different. Of course second babies are just as special, but..... they aren't firsts. This coupled with the fact that my cousin (who's due date was 6 weeks before mine) delivered really, really, really preemie twins a couple of months ago -- has made my thankfully uneventful pregnancy go completely under the radar for my family. Believe me, I'm not complaining -- it's been nice, and quiet -- and the twins are truly a miracle -- two very tiny gifts from God who are doing okay.

In some ways, the pressure is off with your second pregnancy..... you know what to expect..... well, kinda. Maybe I should say you think you know what to expect. I knew that during the first trimester I'd be exhausted...... of course, the last time I didn't have a 10 month old to chase after.... that, I really hadn't counted on. I also knew that constipation was likely and that mad dashes to the bathroom would be required due to frequent peeing...... I didn't know that I'd have 22lbs of company in the bathroom...... flushing the toilet for me whether I had completed my business or not -- and then clapping with pride at the flushing noise.

I knew that as you get toward the end, getting comfy at night is tough -- didn't realize the 'lil guy would start to scream just as I found the exact place to put the pillow. I knew what to expect at the doctor's appointments..... I knew to eat something or drink some chocolate milk with my prenatal vitamin to help fend of nausea.... I knew that nose bleeds are common.... and that people would offer their disapproval when I told them that we opted to not find out the sex.

Yet, some things are still a mystery....... you know, some of the more traditional fears...... I had an emergency c-section at 35 weeks the last time -- so, I didn't have to deal with labor, contractions or my water breaking in public...... AND my bellybutton never popped out..... I'm still trying to find out, does that hurt?

I have friends who gained 30, 40, 50 even 60lbs during pregnancy -- how the heck did they do that???? I gained somewhere between 22 and 24 the last time..... it's hard to know for sure because the toxemia came on so suddenly and there was so much bloating and water weight. This time at 32 weeks I'm up somewhere around 18ish lbs....... and I'm HUGE -- so huge that I'm starting to bust out of my maternity clothes and I am really beginning to wonder what am I going to wear to work for the next few weeks? Where do people who gain that kind of weight find clothes to fit them? Maybe it's because my weight is fairly concentrated -- other than my Aunt Angela's butt, which appeared 10 minutes after I peed on the stick, I'm pretty much all belly....

Why can't you just listen to me???

This morning 4:45 am at chez Dubya

Mrs Big Dubya: I'll give the 'lil guy his antibiotic before we shower him.... 'cuz that stuff is sticky -- and he seems to get it everywhere!
Mr Big Dubya: Good idea
Mrs Big Dubya: Will give him one last dose of Tylenol too, just to be safe.
Mr Big Dubya: Sounds good

A few minutes later, in the bathroom, delivering 'lil man to the Big Dubya for his morning shower......
Mrs Big Dubya: Here he is -- all medicated and ready to go

And then..... about a half hour later, on our way out the door:
Mr Big Dubya: I just gave him some Tylenol...
Mrs Big Dubya: You did WHAAAAAAATTTTT?????
Mr Big Dubya: What? Did you give him some already? Oh, did you tell me that? Sorry.
Mrs Big Dubya: Silence...... coupled with cold, icy glare

It just aint pretty

So, the 'lil man has taken to dancing.

It started out with a little bit of rhythmic clapping...... and soon began to progress.

First we were treated to a little swing at the waist/hips..... it was cute.

Next we noticed that there was a bit of a squat and bounce happening..... he'd bend his knees, bounce up and down..... twist at the waist.... and then the clap was thrown in at the end.

Soon it was the squat and bounce..... the twist..... the clap and some soulful head bobbing.

I kind of (naively) thought he was only performing for us at home.... usually when a particularly musical commercial came on TV, but sometimes a good theme song would get him going. But, I was soon corrected.... I learned that he was strutting his stuff at school too.

School..... yes, this is where I'm assuming he learned his new move..... .he's thrown a foot-stomp into his repertoire.

Yep, that's my boy..... a cross between Elaine Benes & Mr Ed.

Ode to the half sandwich

I know, I'm a pain in the ass.....

Like so many people, I like a sandwich for lunch.....

But it's not enough.... and by not enough, I don't mean volume -- no, I mean variety.

See, if I order/make a whole sandwich -- I do, I eat the whole thing.... because it's there and it looks good and you shouldn't waste food..... but not because I'm hungry or because I want the whole thing. I much prefer to have a half sandwich with a cup of soup, some chips, some fruit or some other accompaniment..... but not too many places offer that.

Some restaurants claim to offer a "lunch special" that says that they'll give you "half a sandwich" and your choice of soup, salad, whatever..... but their half a sandwich is freakin' huge -- much bigger than a whole sandwich I'd make at home.... and they wonder why we are all fat?

I was so excited to discover that the cafeteria in my new building sells half sandwiches..... and they are real half sandwiches!

Now, if I could only get them to sell a half a bagel and a half a muffin (the top half of course), I'd be in business.

We're back..... and a hodgepodge of other stuff

Okay folks.... we are home.... yaaayyyy!

We had an amazing time in Walt Disney World.... and, we didn't even "do the parks". Nope, we just hung out at the pool, went for long walks and played in the water with the 'lil man. He got to chase the ducks (ducks being defined as any small creature with wings) and had the time of his life. I'm not going to get into the wonder that is a maternity bathing suit..... that's a post for another day.......

Of course, my mind can never just focus on the present..... nope, I get all wrapped up in thinking ahead -- in this case, it was to May when we are going to return to WDW for a little family fun w/ Aunt P (who I guess is technically Mrs Tall Guy) and her new hubby Mr Tall Guy.

As we've become somewhat seasoned at traveling with the 'lil man, I was trying to choreograph how we'd manage him, along with his new sibling who'll be 5 or 6 mos old come May. That'll mean two babies...... which means transporting two car seats and perhaps a double stroller. I tried to observe other families who were traveling with "2 under 2"..... I saw a variety of contraptions/solutions -- some looked clever, some just stupid..... then of course there were the rookies.... traveling with a baby for the first time..... they had enough stuff to open a Babies'RUs all by themselves.

I also noticed the challenges associated with the double stroller..... the ones that are side-by-side tend to be so wide that they are difficult to navigate through narrow spaces (store aisles, etc. ) -- and they are so big, bulky and heavy...... they are hardly a help..... the ones that are lightweight and fold down to a somewhat manageable size are cha-ching.... expensive!!!!

I'm gonna have to do some research.

Beware Disney, Here Come the Dubyas

Okay, the 'lil man turns 15 months today..... all together now: AWWWWWWWWW!

So freakin' hard to believe. What's even harder to believe is how well traveled the kid is for such a young and tender age. In his short time here on planet earth, he's been to CT (well, we live here) MA (our families live there) RI, NY, TN, IL, CA, NV, FL, AZ...... the list goes on and on. He's seen the bright lights (and debotchery) of Las Vegas, crossed London Bridge... the bridge his granddad used to take every day when he worked in London (still blows my mind that it's in Lake Havasu, Arizona) -- and now, he's gearing up for his second trip to Walt Disney World -- with another trip with Aunt P and Mr Tall Guy scheduled for May.

Please dear readers..... don't misunderstand..... we aren't wealthy people -- we just like vacations and these guys (I live for cheap flights) along with family timeshares make this champagne lifestyle affordable on a really cheap beer budget.

The last time the 'lil man was in Disney he was only 11 weeks old -- weighed in at just under seven pounds... I was stressed about germs and whether or not to pack a breastpump..... this time, my oh my is it different. To begin with, this trip is with the Big Dubya instead of Granny and Aunt P..... I'm packing Teddy Grahams (you know, bribe food), I'm wondering if we have enough swim diapers packed and hoping we can get my still fairly bald child to wear a sun hat!

Wish me luck!

PS -- Keep the baby names coming..... Quinlan? I actually really like that one!

Oh, but what's in a name?

So, here we are..... about to wrap up the 27th week of pregnancy and we are still struggling with names.

Like the last time (the 'lil Dubya's name was pretty much decided before he was even conceived), I think we have finally come to agreement (albeit a shaky agreement) for a boy's name -- but alas, we are still nowhere if we are blessed with the opportunity to name a little girl.

Aunt P and Granny really like Abigail.... they think that a little girl named Abby would be just terrific. The Big Dubya (and, in fairness I have to agree with him) just doesn't think it's the name for us.

Granddad thinks Liffey would be nice..... after Ireland's River Liffey.... of course then the jokes began.... you could also name her after the River Suck!

Miss America suggested Honor..... I like it, but.... not enough to use.

The Big Dubya suggested some great Irish names.... Niamh, Siobhan, Roisin..... I love them all, and would be thrilled to use any of them if we lived in Ireland -- but they don't pass the pronounceable or spellable tests here in the States.... and I just can't do that to a kid. I had a friend Siobhan in high school..... some cute guys we met in the Bahamas got confused and called her Shazam for our entire spring break!


Because all of this indecision is really starting to stress me out, I finally suggested Fallon -- but the Big Dubya poo-poo'd that one too.... apparently, there was some soap opera in the 80's that had a character named Fallon.

Please dear readers..... help us with a girl name!

Are you people out of your minds?

Ever since Aunt P got her puppy, the comparisons between the dog and my child have been freakin' endless. Conversations that go something like this, are all too frequent:

Mrs Big Dubya: Hi Mamsy
Granny: How's my boy? Did he sleep well last night?
Mrs Big Dubya: Sadly no
Granny: Oh Mrs Dubya, the 'lil Dubya was up all night again?
Mrs Big Dubya: I'm afraid so.
Granny: I just spoke to Aunt P and so was her pup.... she's so tired... I just don't know how you girls do it.

Okay... I know new puppies are handful.... I know they require a lot of care.... I know they are similar to young children -- but, THEY ARE NOT THE SAME!!!

I think this might be why I got so annoyed when a news show broadcaster compared the oh-so-trendy Puppy Purse to a Baby Bjorn.... THEY ARE NOT THE SAME!!!

Why did you take my lid?

I'll admit it..... Colombo make a mistake when they tried the whole snap-in spoon lid thing a few years ago. I mean really, assembling the spoon didn't work out so great and I managed to break the darn thing the few times I forgot to bring a real spoon and attempted to use this contraption -- but why did they have to eliminate the lid entirely, huh?

Yeah, I know the yogurt is still covered with that foil -- but foil can be punctured..... and when you throw it away, a lid keeps it all nice and neat -- now, I've got to look at yogurt remnants in my waste basket all day..... YUCK!

Christmas? Mrs Big Dubya are you CRAZY????

Yeah, well maybe I am – it’s August 21st and I’ve got Christmas on the brain in a big way.

I think there are a bunch of reasons why….. some are worth getting into, others are not. I used to be a hater of all things Christmas.

That changed last year…. I had a reason to see the magic again – and, although the ‘lil Dubya was only 6 months old and more fascinated with the tissue paper than with the presents….. it was his first Christmas and it had to be perfect. We traveled great distance to have his photo taken with the “good Santa”, the Big Dubya got the “perfect tree” nice and early so we could take the ‘lil man’s photo and send all our friends and family the obligatory “photo-Christmas-card”…. The Big Dubya’s always been a Christmas-lover, and he was very patient with my irrational behavior last year..... hopefully this year will be no different.... with two kids, it's likely that I'll be twice as irrational.

And now here we are..... getting ready for the 'lil man's second Christmas AND we are going to have another baby, so it'll be "Baby's First Christmas" all over again. You may wonder why the heck I'd be starting to think about the holidays now.... I mean, HELLO it is AUGUST!!! But dear readers, my due date is December 2nd.... I'm guessing that I'm not going to be all that interested in doing Christmas shopping at the last minute (which is when I usually do it) because I'll be either really, really large or I'll have a new baby at home. So, yes I'm vowing to shop early this year...... I want it all (shopping, wrapping, etc) done before I check-in (am admitted) to the hospital for the arrival of 'liller Dubya(ette?)

The upside is that if all goes well, I'll get to enjoy a stress-free holiday.... the downside is that I'll probably miss all those great sales...... bummer.

Anybody interested in submitting gift-ideas should feel free to do so...... and on a side note, we are still accepting baby name suggestions.... although Dubyasaurus Rex is tempting.... I'm just not "there" yet...... but I do need a name to put on the stocking!

Is there such thing as peeing etiquette?

I know, a very bizarre question, but..... more and more I find myself wondering what the rules are.

I've blogged before about how annoying I find it when people continue to talk to me while I'm in the stall of a public bathroom -- I mean, seriously people, this is a private time -- nothing you have to say can't wait until I come out.

But, something that irks me further..... people who talk on the phone while they are doing their business? I mean seriously, nobody wants to hear you peeing (or worse) while they are on the phone with you. Some people even do this in public bathrooms where..... I was raised not to touch anything, so I'm wondering how these people manage to accomplish the "hover" while still chatting on the phone.

There are places where cell phones simply do not belong.... and I think bathroom stalls are at the top of the list

Feathers?

As the Big Dubya mentions here, Aunt P married Mr Tall Guy on Saturday. It was a gorgeous day -- she was a beautiful bride.

Of course, every wedding has little glitches here & there..... some are more serious than others.... some are just down right funny.

Let me set the stage for you.... I'm 6 months pregnant.... I was asked to be Matron-of-Honor (I personally prefer the term Chief-of-Staff) before we knew I was in the family way.... once I realized that I'd be livin' large when the big day arrived, I offered to bow out gracefully. But Aunt P, always wanting to be polite, refused my offer and said a maternity bridesmaid dress would be fine with her.

The other two bridesmaids are childhood friends -- I've known these girls since they were in kindergarten and they are the sweetest things. I used to drive them to highschool, they used to visit me in college and I'd take them to keg parties...... they are really just extensions of Aunt P -- kinda like having two more little sisters.

On the Thursday before the wedding, Aunt P called to ask what I'd used as my "something blue" -- I told her that a friend had given me a blue garter, and that I'd be happy to lend it to her -- it could serve as either the "something blue" or the something "borrowed" -- she agreed and into the overnight bag it went. Once we arrived at the hotel, it turns out that the girls had gotten Aunt P a garter as well..... a cheesy one with feathers. It was a hoot and I told Aunt P she could wear theirs instead.... it had a little blue bow on it, so we could put mine away. Of course, Aunt P being diplomatic decided to wear both.

Fast forward a couple of hours.... we are standing in front of our friends, our family and a guy who's been a Catholic priest for 48 years (I'm not joking.... 48 years!). It comes time to offer each other the sign of peace and Father asked Aunt P & Mr Tall Guy if they'd like to go offer their parents the sign of peace. Aunt P answered "Yes Father" took one step backward, looked down and saw that there were feathers all over the floor. She quickly stepped forward and said -- "No thank you Father" -- the priest was quite confused..... "Aunt P, are you sure" -- "Yes Father".

Aunt P turns to me "what do I do?" -- so, I suggested she try to kick them over my way and I'd scoop them up the next time I kneeled down -- this strategy worked (although the laughter and the visual of big-old-pregnant me crawling around on the floor indicated that something was amok) and disaster was averted.

One Computer, Two Computer, Three Computer, Four

So, back when I was first out of college.... I bought a desktop comuter from a friend of mine. He, under completely sketchy circumstances, takes random computer parts -- builds computers and sells them to his friends.... for cheap money.

It was a decent computer.... it did what I needed it to do -- which wasn't really much. Of course, after some time, that computer shit the bed and he was kind enough to build me another one -- this one was a little bit fancier.... could do a little bit more, a little more quickly -- still not a NASA computer or anything -- but it did what I needed to do and I was happy.

Around that same time -- my new fella (Mr Big Dubya) got a brand new computer-- a gift from his parents. It wasn't high-end, but it was a good solid IBM -- it could do what he needed it to.

Not too long after that..... it was determined that my replacement computer needed some "enhancements" so my friend took it back to "work on it". Well, a few weeks later, I really needed my computer back -- I was in grad school and had papers to write -- and my friend said that he was unable to "enhance" my computer, but he had a nifty laptop that he could give me instead. This was a pretty good solution -- as, laptops come in handy in grad school.

Again, the laptop was not at all state-of-the-art, but it did what I needed it to do -- email, internet research and basic word-processing.

After we were married, the Big Dubya kind of out-grew his desktop. It was really an entry-level system and he was interested in doing more..... so we took advantage of a program at the school he was working and got a really good discount on a Dell desktop which could do it all.... it was really fancy and he was one happy camper.

A couple of years later, my laptop finally came to the end. It assumed a personality of its own -- it shut itself off, froze, unfroze, got hopped up on speed...... it developed a real bad ass 'tude. All things considered, it had served me well -- gotten me through grad school and that was all I had really wanted from it.

When we found out we were having the 'lil man, I got the laptop itch again -- the Big Dubya loves toys and was more than willing to let me scratch the itch. I knew I'd be working from home after the 'lil guy arrived, so the portability of a laptop would come in real handy. Again, we took advantage of an employee discount with Dell (through my company this time) and got a really sweet machine -- it could do things I didn't know I wanted to do.

A year or so went by and the Big Dubya was spending more and more time on my machine than on his own -- simply because the portability a laptop affords is key when multi-tasking with a baby. Eventually, he broke down and got himself a laptop -- for those keeping score at home, that's one desktop and two laptops in the Dubya household.... yep, still only two adults.

Well, last week I started a new job that requires me to divide my time between two offices.... yep, you guessed it -- I now have a work-issued laptop to add to our collection.

Checking into hotel with baby....

Mrs Big Dubya: Honey, when you check-in to the hotel -- please make sure the porta-crib is there.... it would be great if you could get it all set up so that when we drop the 'lil man off we can just put him right in -- I'll get him into his pajamas before you leave because he'll probably fall asleep in the car on the way over
Mr Big Dubya: Okay -- good idea.

Later that day....... the Big Dubya called to check in

Mrs Big Dubya: Hi honey, was the porta-crib in the room when you got there?
Mr Big Dubya: Oh, shit!

Ahhhhh, to be single with too much disposable income

Aunt P: I love my new strapless bra, it holds everything up and it stays where it's supposed to
Mrs Big Dubya: That's great -- Victoria's Secret?
Aunt P: Yep
Mrs Big Dubya: Expensive though, huh?
Aunt P: Yep
Mrs Big Dubya: Well, if it really works, and you aren't worried about pulling it up all day then I guess it's worth it..... how much 50 bucks?
Aunt P: Yep -- And you can't even machine wash ordry it
Mrs Big Dubya: So what are you going to do when it gets dirty? Throw it away?
Aunt P: Yep -- Probably.

Public Service Announcement

I know, I know..... I'm a bad, bad blogstress......

Anyway, I thought I'd interrupt all of this not-blogging with a public service announcement.

Town Fair Tire is the best company on earth!

Last Thursday, I was on my way home and my low-tire-pressure light came on. Yes, I'm a typical girl and was very annoyed that I was too far away from home to just let the Big Dubya deal with it. So, I stopped at a gas station -- looked around to see if there was some strappin' fella to notice me, the six-month-pregnant woman with low tire pressure..... but alas, there was nobody there to offer assistance, so I went to fill the tire myself. Sadly, I couldn't get the little screw thing off the tire -- it was metal and had sorta rusted on there. So, back in the car I got and stopped at Town Fair Tire -- sheepishly went inside and asked the man if he could put air in my tire for me. There was no snicker, no making me feel bad about myself -- just asked me to pull the car up to the bay and he'd send someone right out.

The guy filled my tire and thanked me for coming in! That's right -- no ridicule for not doing it myself AND no charge!

By the time I got home, there was a hissing sound coming out of the tire -- it was going to need repair. The Big Dubya took it off for me and on Friday morning the 'lil man and I set out to get it repaired. Because the fellows were so nice to me at Town Fair, I decided to go back there (albeit a different location). I got there first thing in the morning -- and explained to the guy that my flat tire was in the back of the car and that I'd like to get it fixed and put back on. He went outside, checked it out and told me they'd take care of it right away. While we waited, we had two guys come out to play with the 'lil man -- and when they were done -- I was shocked..... they thanked me for coming in and again, no charge.

Here's the thing, I hadn't bought the tire there.... had never bought a tire there..... yet, they took care of me like I was a life-long customer.

You know what? it worked -- I've told everyone I've talked to recently about what great service I got and when I do need tires..... that'll be my first stop.

Why does everyone forget about Zan and Jana?

The US Postal Service has announced plans to have a series of superhero stamps.... all the usual suspects are represented -- Wonderwoman, Superman, Batman, the Green Lantern, Plastic Man.... heck, even the ever-forgotten Aquaman is there.

But, here's my question.... where the heck are Zan and Jana, huh? Why do the Wonder Twins always get forgotten? They've got cool purple outfits, pointy ears and funky hair -- they can put their twin rings together and take the shape of neato stuff...... they represent truth, justice and the American way..... and they are a brother & sister that actually play nice.

Apparently baby names is a pretty good topic

Thanks so much to everyone who has already contributed to our quest to name the ‘liller Dubya (or Dubya-ette)…. please keep the suggestions coming. Believe it or not, it’s a comfort to know that we aren’t the only ones who struggle with what to name these ‘lil people we are entrusted with.

One thing that struck me as interesting…… is the number of people who commented or emailed me about being “talked out of” a name and wishing they hadn’t been…… I have more than a couple of friends who didn't go with their "first choice" for one reason or another.... and now wish they had stuck to their guns.

So, dear readers, I have another question to pose to you……

Is it okay to name your baby something similar to that of another family member?

For example – if the baby is going to have a cousin named Emma, is it okay to use the name Emily? If the baby is going to have a cousin named Jennifer, is it okay to use the name Jenna? If the baby is going to have a cousin named Danielle, is it okay to use the name Daniel?

I thought it might be okay if the children were going to have different last names….. ex Emma Jones and Emily Smith – but it would be too close if the children shares a last name ex Danielle McDonald and Daniel McDonald…..

The Big Dubya, of course, doesn’t think it matters…..

What do you guys think?

Go Ahead, Name Our Baby

Let's start with what we know..... We are expecting a baby.

Now, we'll share what we don't know... we don't know what flavor of baby we are having...... I mean, we aren't going to find out the sex.

We also do not know what we are going to name the baby..... we have no boys name... we have no girls name (we didn't have a girls name the last time either... luckily we didn't end up needing one).

So, Mrs Big Dubya is officially accepting suggestions.

The guidelines are as follows:
1. Must be spellable
2. Must be pronounceable
3. Must not be in the Top 100 names over the past 5 years
4. We tend to like Irish names.... but it's not required
5. Biblical is okay too....

You all should be honored that I'm seeking your assistance.... I thought about selling the right to name the baby on eBay..... this could be a revenue generator, but I opted to turn to you guys instead.

Not all I dreamed it would be

We live in an amazing country.... I mean, is there anything that isn't available to us?

The one thing that amazes me is that despite all that is available to us... we focus on what isn't. I'm thinking specifically of the various retail chains. I remember when WalMart first came to our area -- I was psyched.... I'd been to WalMart when I visited Texas and couldn't wait 'til we got one. I mean where better to get your cleaning supplies and toiletry stuff -- same with Target. I'd been to Target when I was in Colorado and hoped they'd open one near home -- eventually they did.... and I mean seriously, is there anything that you can't get at Target?

Same is true for food chains -- they are very regional. When the Big Dubya and I hit the Boston area, very often we hit Papa Ginos for some pizza..... when my friend comes home to the northeast from Colorado -- two of her first stops are for Dunkin' Donuts and for a D'Angelo's sub -- 'cause she can't get those where she lives. Aunt P heads right for Steak 'N Shake as soon as her plane touches down in Florida.

Well, for years I'd heard all about Cold Stone Creamery..... I'd even saw the company profiled on the FoodNetwork -- I couldn't wait to try this place. I love, love, love ice-cream and this was supposedly the best to be had. The Big Dubya and I were in Arizona with some friends for Thanksgiving last year and across the street from the hotel..... yep, there it was a Cold Stone Creamery.... right next to another of our favorites.... Red Robin.

Sadly, I went -- and it was just okay..... actually, I didn't even like it. When I told my friends who are big CSC fans, they said it must have been what I ordered -- I just had to give it a second chance. So, last week -- I saw that one had opened here in CT -- so I went on my lunch break and got a small cup of ice-cream -- and again..... it just wasn't good. I guess I'm just a Dairy Queen girl through and through.

Items that I love, but are way too expensive

Yes, I know.... I've been a really bad blogstress lately, but..... I'm back and promise to be better.


To begin with.... I've decided to highlight some diaperbag necessities that I've come to rely on but are wayyyyyy too expensive when you consider what it is you are getting.


First, Baby Orajel Teething Swaps...... these things are great for the diaper bag. If you're 'lil man's like ours and decides to get his four top front teeth all at once...... sometimes you need something to help ease the discomfort.... teething rings, frozen face cloths.... all those are great, but sometimes you need more. If you are in the car, or away from home -- using one of these is so much easier (and more hygienic) than trying to put your finger in the 'lil one's mouth. But, when you consider the fact that it's just a Q-tip with some orajel inside...... HELLO -- OVERPRICED! CVS is charging between $8-10 for a pack of 12..... Target usually has 'em for somewhere between $4-$5 -- still too much, but.......

Next, Huggies makes these disposable changing pads -- they are great. I know, I know -- all diaper bags come with re-useable changing pads that are perfectly fine -- but these are smaller, take up less space and they are disposable (again, more hygienic). The only downside is that they are kind of hard to find and that when you can find them..... they are a bit expensive when you consider what you are getting...... OVERPRICED!

Lastly, our 'lil man loves, loves, loves to feed himself -- yet, he doesn't understand the concept of a plate. He wants to pick it up too -- so we have to put food on the table in front of him. Restaurants aren't very clean -- so these little place mat things are awesome -- but Babies R Us charges something around $9 for a pack of 20 -- c'mon people it's the equivalent of a sheet if Seran Wrap -- OVERPRICED

But alas, they all make my life easier....... so, I buy 'em.

How do I love my sister, let me count the ways

Nobody can relate to you like your sister…. so, when I conveyed to Aunt P how bummed I was about my wardrobe (or lack thereof), she sprung into action.

You see dear readers, I’m kind of in that awkward stage where….. my regular clothes are too small…. But my maternity clothes look a bit ridiculous…. so the prospect of attending my cousin’s wedding this weekend got me beyond down…. what the hell am I going to wear?

Imagine how psyched I was when Aunt P sent me the following email after running to her local Gap Maternity on her lunch break (apparently, they are having one hell of a sale)

-----Original Message-----
From: Aunt P
Sent: Thursday, June 15, 2006 12:49 PM
To: Mrs Big Dubya
Subject: Phew!

I did a lot in a little time!

I pretty much got anything sized small, that was on sale and wasn't too tunic-y. Tunics appear to be big with pregnant women.

You can pick it up on your way home tomorrow if you want

It's like having my very own personal shopper!

How I spent my birthday weekend

by 'lil Dubya

Mammy & Daddy bought me this cool new wagon for my birthday -- all the kids in the neighborhood have 'em -- it's lots of fun, their parents pull them all around and they just sit there. You should have seen Daddy's eyes light up when he saw that it has cup holders I think he might have some ideas on how to use those bad boys this summer. I had planned on spending quite a bit of time being pulled around this weekend -- you know, waving at my peeps in the 'hood
But, unfortunately, the weather didn't cooperate -- and we were stuck indoors.

On Friday, my actual birthday, Mammy insisted we do some housework -- being the model kid that I am, I decided to help out a bit -- first with a little vacuuming

then, some dishes

I thought that if I made the most of being inside on Friday, that Saturday's weather just had to be better -- but...... I was wrong. When I crawled up to the front door on Saturday morning, all I saw was more rain.

My friend Baby Buffalo was visiting, so we sat down and tried to come up with creative ways to pass the time...
Baby Buffalo, an accomplished ballerina, thought it would be a good idea if she gave me some dance lessons.... a dude's gotta know how to dance

I was pretty annoyed that she wouldn't let me lead..... so I explained to her that despite my stature... I'm still the guy.... and, she kindly came down to my level.

We worked up quite an appetite and celebrated my new moves with some cake!


Next weekend is my birthday party..... and it's gonna be awesome... I heard Aunt P's been doing some shopping!

One year ago today, my world became a better place....

Happy 1st Birthday 'lil man!

One year....

It's impossible to believe that the 'lil man will be a year tomorrow.

I remember that day so vividly.... getting up in the morning, going to the doctor for a check-up, touring a couple of daycare centers, meeting the pediatrician..... going into work late, and then staying late..... I remember the details of the entire day with incredible clarity (well, that is until they administered the mass doses of morphine.... at that point, things get kinda fuzzy and chronology totally goes out the window)

What I can't remember is what the day before was like.... I have no idea what I did on June 1, 2005.... it's hard to believe.... but, I don't remember a single thing that happened to me that day -- the day before the most profound change in my life. Little did I know, my life -- my entire world was about to be reprioritized.... my entire focus was about to shift.