That would be a pregnant woman going ass-over-tea-kettle in the middle of the office...... in this case, Me!
Yep, I managed to avoid falling down when I was pregnant with the 'lil man -- but I took one hell of a digger last Thursday.
It started off simply -- I was sitting at my desk and decided that I needed a red pen. I got up and made my way to the supply cabinet..... I was in our downtown office for the day, that's where the "good" supplies are kept. I selected the red pen I wanted, grabbed a new yellow highlighter for good measure and began the 50-step-walk back to where I was working.... no rocky or uneven terrain -- just industrial the carpet that you'd find in any office-building.
That's when it happened....... my foot just didn't hit the floor right..... my other foot tried in vain to compensate.... my arms flailed out to all sides looking hopelessly for something to grab onto..... there was nothing..... I was going down....... and I was going down hard.
The thoughts running through my head.... Must twist to other side, must not fall on baby....... and then there I was, laying on the ground. I had managed to avoid falling on my stomach..... in the process I beat the living shit out of both my knees, my hands and my ribs (I think from the freakish twisting-to-avoid-the-belly-motion).
I heard shrieks..... no, they weren't mine. A co-worker witnessed the tail-end of the acrobatic-display and then several others rushed from their offices to see what happened. The pain was excruciating..... but the embarrassment was oh, so much worse. I hopped up and deposited myself back into my chair -- hoping everyone would go away before I started bleeding.....
"I'm fine, I'm fine" I promised them all..... as they stood their pale and ashen. "Really, I swear.... I'm fine" and I was.....
Once everyone finally retreated to their offices, I was able to survey the damage -- skinned palms, skinned knee..... oooohhhhh the beginnings of a really, really ugly bruise. The ribs concerned me the most..... they were the closest thing to the baby..... so, I sat quietly -- and waited....... and then the baby moved and I knew that all was fine.
I think I'm gonna wrap myself in bubble-wrap for the next 6 weeks.
October 9, 2006
What's big and awkward and can make grown business men come running?
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3 comments:
Oh you poor thing. Few things hurt more than pride when they're scraped. I broke a bone in my foot 5 days before my due date tripping on some phantom object...in the parking lot of mt dr's office, no less. What did I do? I landed on all 4's so I knew the baby was fine. After making sure nobody had seen me, I hobbled back to my car (the dr's office was steps away)and drove home to have Cliff take a look at my ankle, which I was pretty sure I had broken. Luckily, it wasn't the ankle, just a bone close to it.
Funny how being so front heavy can mess with your balance! Really glad you're okay...
So glad you and the baby are okay! When my wife was pregnant with the twins, that was my worst fear - as she's kinda clumsy and she was wider than she was tall.
And she did fall, but luckily she fell back and only landed on her butt. But to hear her tell the story, her co-workers were much more freaked out than she was.
You don't understand... Mrs. Big Dub is a bit on the clumsy side. Not that she frequently bowls, but if she ever does, it usually involves a minimum of one ungraceful sprawl across the lane... The fact that she made it all the way through 'lil dub's and this far into the pregnancy of 'lil dub part deux is nothing short of amazing! Kudos sis! And we're all very glad that both of you are ok, even though the bruises were impressive!
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