Champions!

Everything is as it should be

Dear Aunt P’s friend

When Aunt P called me on Saturday night to tell me that your mother was at “the end”, I just couldn’t believe this could be happening. She had just retired, you just had a baby, your brother is getting married next month…. she’s only 58 years old – how could she possibly be dying?

When the phone rang at 6:30 Sunday morning, I saw Aunt P’s number on the caller ID – calls that come at that hour rarely bring good news – no words were needed, I knew that she had passed.

When I saw you at the wake, I could tell the past few weeks had really taken a toll on you. You looked good, but tired and small. Gone was the young girl Aunt P went to second grade with and the teenager that carpooled to high school with us – before us stood a grown woman providing comfort to all those who had come to offer their comfort and support.

Your Dad looked so lost, and I just watched him trying to hold it together. It felt like you had assumed the role of the parent and he, the role of the child -- your strength was propping him up from across the room. You and your brother are truly the greatest gifts your parents ever gave each other.

The next day at the funeral, I sat next to Aunt P as she rocked your baby girl. It’s so unbelievably cruel that such a wonderful woman will never get to see those chubby little legs toddle their first steps or hear that tiny voice call her “Grammy” for the first time.

I know it's odd to say, but in a way I’m almost grateful that you didn’t lose your mom until after you became a mother yourself – because now that you are a mother, you can begin to fathom how much joy you brought her and how proud she was of the remarkable woman you’ve grown into. It doesn't soften the blow, but maybe it helps in some small way.

I’m sure it’s all a blur to you now, but the church was filled with the lives she’d shaped – friends like Granny, me and Aunt P – former students who were guided by her faith, her unintimidating style and her sense of humor – colleagues who followed her extraordinary example.

Unfortunately, she wasn’t blessed with a long enough life – but you should be so proud of the contributions she made to her community – and know, that her family was her greatest achievement and it is a magnificent one.

Lean on us when you need to
Love Mrs Big Dubya

Prosti-tots

I remember when I first read a post written by my good friend Kara, I admit it -- Kara, I'm so very sorry, I thought you were exaggerating..... out of frustration or for humor or for effect.

I was wrong, I was very, very wrong.

When she first wrote the post, I didn't have a daughter -- I hadn't really spent too much time shopping for little girl clothing -- and when I did, it was hoodies from the Gap or pajamas from the DisneyStore -- pretty vanilla stuff.

I should have been clued in when we went to DisneyWorld in May -- we were at the pool and my infant daughter was wearing something like this, other infants (yes, infants) I saw were wearing something more like this. I'm not sure a body that's still wearing a diaper is meant to wear a triangle string bikini top, but.....

The daughter of a close friend turns 4 next week -- she's tall for her age, so probably needs a size 5. I decided to go get her something cute -- I started off at the Disney Store.... thought maybe some cute pajamas or something princess-related. The pajamas? no, no really cute pajamas -- but they did have "nighties". I don't mean nightgowns..... I mean nighties -- sheer nighties. First of all, it's October -- almost November and this is Connecticut!!!! Sheer??? Where's the flannel?

I left the Disney Store disappointed and went to The Limited Too, well -- I only lasted 5 minutes in that store -- they are clearly the official outfitters of Prosti-tots -- I mean, seriously -- I wouldn't allow a teenager to wear some of the stuff I saw in that store. Gymboree was modest enough, but a bit too dressy for everyday wear and the everything I saw at OldNavy was just poorly made -- looked like it might disintegrate if you tried to wash it.

I ended up at my old stand-by, The Gap -- but they aren't getting off so easy either -- they had their fair share of baby-tart clothes too. I was able to find something 4-year old appropriate, but I had to shop for it and there weren't an abundance of choices.

What is wrong with people? Maybe we wouldn't be seeing stories about birth control for 11 year olds if we let little girls dress like little girls. No, I don't think we need to dress them like Laura Ingles, but how about keeping them fully clothed?

My name is Mrs Big Dubya, and I'm a Bread, Butter, Cheese & Cream-aholic

I've figured out why I'm fat......

I wish I could tell you that it's because I've been drinking too much beer or wine.... nope, haven't had either in a few weeks (geez, I better get on that).

I wish I could tell you that it's because I eat chocolate, cookies, pies, cakes, candy..... but no, I've got a huge candy jar in my office and I rarely touch it.

Nope -- my problem is real food. I love real, good, rich food. Big chunky bread slathered with creamy butter, cream-based soups and anything, I mean anything with cheese melted on it.

Aunt P's been trying to inspire me back onto the WeightWatchers wagon, but fate, fate I tell you keeps intervening.

This morning, I went downstairs to the cafeteria with my 1 point Thomas' English Muffin I popped that puppy into the toaster while the ginormous bagels taunted me. It came out of the toaster not toasted enough, so I popped it back in..... it came out burnt. I can't eat burnt muffin..... maybe I should get a bagel? or a big bowl of oatmeal with scoops and scoops of brown sugar.

I ate the burnt muffin..... it sucked.

Yesterday I wasn't so strong though... I went to get lunch at Baja Fresh I figured I could get something healthy there.... well, it's gone -- apparently it has been for a while, but Panera Bread was right next door -- I should have gotten a nice salad with a smart dressing, but instead I got cream of broccoli soup and this amazing chicken Caesar sandwich.... which comes with either bread or chips..... they made a mistake and gave me both and oh my Gawd was it good -- but, yeah I'm a big old fatty.

I need a support group.

We're all Coming Over -- Okay?

My family's coming over on Saturday -- my mother, my sister -- my mother's two (maybe three) sisters and their husbands -- maybe some of my cousins with their spouses and families.

I don't know when on Saturday

Don't know how long they are staying

Not sure if they are sleeping over

So, yes -- I have company coming on Saturday.... no idea how many, no idea what meal (or meals) I'll have to come up with for them .... no idea how many beds I have to make up or assign....

How does one shop for this?

In defense of the drive thru workers

I was reading the New England Mamas the other day, and I was kind of struck by a post written by a blogger I like reading very much.

I was kind of in a cranky mood, and started scripting a really snarky comment -- but then, thought better of it -- I like these ladies and don't want to piss them off.... over something so stupid. I've gotten the wrong food at drive-thru and it's inconvenient, it's annoying.... it sucks.

But, for some reason -- the post has kind of stuck with me and I figured rather than drop a comment on their site -- I'd just use my own space to share my thoughts.

In the interest of full disclosure, it has been a few years -- but I actually did work at a McDonald's drive-thru for 4+ years during high school and college.

Yes, I understand that sometimes there can be a mistake in your order. Yes, you should get what you ordered -- and it should be hot (or cold) when it is served to you.

But,

Did you know that these kids in the drive through are not making a ton of money?

Did you know that they serve hundreds of customers every hour with a fairly good accuracy rate?

Did you know that those booths are heated/air conditioned, but with the window constantly open it is freezing cold in the winter and boiling hot in the summer?

Did you know that often times that your car radio, loud exhaust and/or background chatter interferes with the speaker and that you can't always hear what the customer is saying?

Did you know that their performance is based on the number of seconds the car sits at the window? and that often times the cars behind you yell at these workers when you take a long time to get your money out or make changes to what you want once you get to the window?

Did you know that owner/operators won't let you just throw some ketchup in every bag because it impacts their bottom line? They make you wait 'til the customer asks for it.

Did you know that perverted old men drive through naked from the waist down to show you their "goods"?

I understand that you drive through because you are in a hurry and you expect them to get it right -- but are you really going to complain about a burger that cost you $0.99, a burger you couldn't even bother to get out of your car for.

The Holidays

Can you believe it? the holidays are fast approaching -- I mean, Thanksgiving is just 49 days away..... Christmas.... 82 days people, 82 days -- Did Easter even happen? 4th of July? I don't think I remember them..... where'd the year go?

Last year I was on maternity leave over the holidays, so I was able to do my Christmas shopping quite leisurely -- this year with a 10-month old hell bent on walking and a 2-year old who's hell bent on knocking her over -- not to mention a house, a husband and a full-time job -- I'm wondering how I'm going to get it all done.

Fortunately, I tend to be kind of organized..... I buy for a lot of children -- nieces, nephews, children of close friends.... so historically, I've picked one gift and given it to all of them. Last year it was the always comes in handy Gap Fleece -- good for 'lil ones, good for big ones, good for boys, good for girls -- reasonably priced when you shop the sale. Last November, I went into our local BabyGap/GapKids and bought something like fifteen of these babies. Not sure what this year's "Gift from the Dubyas" will be, but I'm open to suggestions.

Last year, I had so much time on my hands that I actually bought into the madness --

Does anybody know what this year's "hot toy" is supposed to be?

STOP TOUCHING MY CHILD!!!!!

It's so true in life.... everything happens for a reason.

Several years ago, the Big Dubya took a job -- a job that in the end, just wasn't a great fit for him. It's hard to regret his taking the job though, as it resulted in some of the great things in our life. It brought us to the area where we live which, for the most part, we love. And, it introduced us to the Buffaloes, who have become the most wonderful friends.

There were some other people we met in the course of this job..... some who we were friendly with, but then lost touch.... sad, but it happens. Some who we thought we were friends with, but as it turns out we weren't really..... disappointing, but oh well. And then there are the people that these people bring along with them -- girlfriends, boyfriends......

The Big Dubya was friends with a woman -- she was a lot of fun and we spent time with her and her boyfriend. We liked this woman, and the guy, well....... he was kind of strange -- but, other than the "ick" factor, he seemed harmless enough -- we kind of accepted him as part of the package. We weren't all that disappointed when their relationship began to fizzle out..... we'd hoped that she would move on to somebody better -- and then we lost touch with her, but we do know through some mutual friends that she did meet someone and married him -- so, it sounds like she's found some well deserved happiness.

Unfortunately, the ick dude..... well, he lives near us. For the past couple of years, we've somehow managed to miss running into him...... but you know it was bound to happen.

A couple of months ago, I was sitting at a traffic light and Mister Ick sped by me on a red moped..... I'll address my thoughts on grown 40-something men riding teeny-tiny mopeds in another post. I immediately called the Big Dubya and Mrs Cape Buffalo to relay my sighting..... I was thrilled that it was merely a drive-by and that I wasn't forced to make small talk with the guy, we had a good laugh and didn't give it a second thought. This past Saturday..... not so lucky.

The 'lil Dubyette and I were minding our own business, waiting in the deli line at Stop & Shop when I saw him. There was nowhere to run to, nowhere to hide. I could only bow my head and pray that he didn't see me...... I began playing with 'lil Dubyette's toes..... hoping to avert my eyes without looking like I was averting my eyes.

It was too late, he saw me --

Mr Ick: "Mrs Big Dubya, is that you? it's me Mr Ick"

Me: "Of course, hello Mr Ick -- how are you?"

We made small talk, and then he began rubbing 'lil Dubyette's head (WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU.... GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY BABY!)..... smart child that she is, she began to grimace and whimper -- lucky for him he stopped, so I didn't have to lay on a smack-down in front of the cheese case.

I got to meet Mrs Ick..... yes, apparently he found a Mrs Ick and they have a Baby Ick.... And then he started asking me all sorts of questions about his Ex.

Uhm...... kind of uncomfortable in front of new wife, dontcha think???

Other than she met a guy, moved and got married.... I know nothing -- so I told him that hoping to end the whole ordeal -- but he started discussing their break-up and how they'd kept in touch and that she'd moved to Virginia......

My deli number was called, so I bid farewell and placed my order -- praying that they'd just go away.

He did...... I proceeded to shop very, very slowly -- didn't want to risk a second encounter.