We are so spoiled

I was emailing back and forth yesterday -- with a friend I don't see or speak to nearly enough. Since we had kids and I moved out of state -- I find we just don't seem to get together like we did, like we should. Email's so impersonal..... yet, if we didn't email.... we probably wouldn't talk at all -- so impersonal as it may be, I'm very grateful for it.


Anyway, we were chatting away about this and that..... what our kids are doing, what our weekend plans are (oh, us?? yeah, we don't have any plans yet because the Big Dubya's been a big lazy ass and hasn't told me what he wants to do... so we'll probably end up at home, which is fine, but.....) and our shared desire to have a baby #3. We've had nearly identical discussions with our husbands about the topic.... we get similar arguments from them -- we don't have the money, the space, the time..... it would be chaos, we are getting older, how'd we pay for college and where on earth would we put a third car seat?


All reasonable arguments....


And, then I thought about it.... I'm one of three...... my mother didn't have a car until I was in high school and Aunt P and I shared a room 'til then too -- I think we've turned out okay.


Isn't it funny how spoiled we've all become? I mean, my mother came from a family of 7 children -- they lived in a tiny house with 3 small bedrooms and it didn't even have a bathroom until the 1950's. My dad's family was considered "small" with a mere 6 children..... his cousins were all one of 10, 11 or 12. He remembers the day their house got electricity -- and neither of my parents had a phone in the house where the grew up -- my dad's parents got theirs when he was in college -- and I remember when my mother's mother finally got hers (no, I'm not that old).


We've got ourselves programmed to think that our kids have to wear clothes from Hanna, Lilly or Ralph (my personal obsession is with Baby Gap, but.....) and that their days just have to be filled with lessons, play dates, trips and activities -- why can't they just go play in the dirt? we did. They have to have a DVD player in the car for long rides -- whereas we did just fine making up games..... we used mile markers, license plates and of course, we played countless games of Uno.


It will boggle your mind if you stop to think about how our kids are being raised compared to how our parents were raised and how they raised us... without disposable diapers, without wipes (how can you live in a world without baby wipes???) -- there were no Boppys, no Exersaucers, no battery operated swings.... all things that we think we absolutely "NEED" our parents and grandparents did just fine without.

Don't get me wrong -- I'm not casting stones at any of you..... my kids have more "stuff" than they will ever need or want -- and I think for the most part that's okay -- as long as we raise them to be grateful and to know how fortunate they are.

The Stroller Derby

No not the blog....... this is my life people.

Once upon a time, I was an expectant mother..... yes, it seems like so very long ago. At the urging (insistence) of my sister, I registered..... and after laboring and deliberating and researching...... we registered for a Graco travel system. Friends and family all weighed in on their preference.... "Peg Perego's the one you want" I heard over and over again. But, I chose the Graco largely because the car seat received a very high safety rating and only weighed 7lbs -- but also because I couldn't bring myself to register for something that cost as much as the Peg Peregos.

The car seat was terrific -- safe but light enough for me to carry without trouble, the 'lil lady is still using it. The stroller? Well, it was big and bulky -- it handled like a dream and had two awesome cup holders as well as a cute compartment for other stuff, but it was big and bulky and took up the entire trunk of my car. I never wanted to take it out because I knew that I'd ultimately have to lift it back in.

While at TJMaxx one day, I found a Peg Perego for $100 or so (I can't really remember now) it was a similar pattern to the Graco car seat so I picked it up. It was much easier to manage and it fit in the back of my car much better -- I used it quite a bit -- 'til the tray snapped off (I guess it was at TJ's for a reason, huh?). The stroller still worked fine, but -- it looked kind of ghetto with a broken tray dangling from it.

When the 'lil man got a little older, I ended up getting one of the compact strollers..... it's really just a fancy umbrella stroller. I liked it a lot -- so handy, so compact -- but he couldn't really recline in it and it offered minimal protection from the sun/elements.

When the 'lil lady came along I insisted that I wouldn't bother buying a double stroller -- I could make do with what I had. I used the Baby Bjorn a lot -- coupled with the mini-stroller, the kids were manageable. Except..... w/ the Bjorn a coat is tough (for you or the baby) and getting them both in and out of the car and settled into their stroller/Bjorn in the midst of a New England winter can be a challenge.

I secretly spied double strollers..... man, they are pricey! I was in the mall one day and I saw one that looked cool, manageable -- not too big, not too fancy -- but could recline and would provide sun coverage. I stopped the woman and asked her about it -- she was psyched to share the info -- she told me everything. Apparently, I'm not the only one who obsesses about strollers..... she'd collected a few herself but really liked this particular model.

So, based on the recommendation of this random woman I stalked in the mall, we broke down and bought one. We literally left the mall and went to BabiesRUs to buy this stroller. So far, it's been all I dreamed it would be..... EXCEPT c'mon you knew it was coming...... why else would I be boring you all with my stroller fetish. The hoods (the manufacturer calls them canopies) are bent. They've been kind of mis-shapen since we got it, but I thought they would regain their shape once the stroller wasn't all smooshed in the box -- but, nope -- and the more we try to manipulate them back into shape -- the more warped they get.

The problem with the mangled hoods isn't really as cosmetic as it sounds -- its more that they don't offer much sun protection. I thought we just got unlucky, but while in Disneyland last week we spied several other couples with the same stroller and all of them had mangled hoods. I approached a few of these parents and asked about it -- pointing to our own gimpy hoods. They all held the same opinion -- love the stroller, but the hoods are a disgrace. A few people had improvised and picked up these in order to provide some protection from the sun.

When I got home, I dug out the instruction manual -- to see if there was a customer service number and sure enough they had an order form where you could order replacement parts. So, I filled it out and faxed it over to them -- asking them to replace the hoods for free. My rationale is that I love the stroller, but it is only 6 months old -- the hoods should be in better shape than this, and replacing them should be covered by the warranty. I asked them to contact me if they had questions...... haven't heard anything yet. Good sign? Who knows!

I'll let you know how it goes.

In the meantime, I did pick up the supplemental shade and have called a couple of consignment shops to see if they have a gently used double stroller in stock -- maybe I can trade a couple of my singles for a deal on a double? or a triple? (just kidding and, of course trying to freak the Big Dubya out) who knows!

Disneyland? or just MiniDisney?

Just back from a week in California that began in Santa Monica and wrapped up with a few days in Disneyland and Disney's California Adventure Park.

My sister and I took my mother to DisneyWorld back in the fall of 2001..... it was shortly before I got married. It was my first trip and I recall how amazed I was at all the pride and joy these employees ("cast members") had. It wasn't just the "Welcome Home" people at the hotels, it was the people running the rides, the people serving the food, the people driving the buses.... even the people cleaning the bathrooms -- they were all doing their work with a spring in their step.

Since that first trip in 2001, I've been back to DisneyWorld -- geez, it must be half a dozen times. My impression of the place hasn't changed -- everyone walks around like they are an owner -- and it's nice..... maybe a tiny bit irritating at times, but it's really nice.

Disneyland? Well, Disneyland was different. Don't get me wrong -- the 'lil Dubya had an AMAZING time. He got to meet Buzz and Woody -- he got to dance with Sully and Boo -- he shook hands with Mickey and waved sheepishly at Pluto. The dancers gave him high-fives and the photographers couldn't wait to take his picture. But....... there were also the usual disgruntled employees that you'd see anywhere..... well, anywhere except DisneyWorld that is.

It was really nothing too serious, just a guy who was annoyed by my coffee order..... a gift shop clerk who wasn't all that interested in answering questions.... a ride operator who didn't care when I told him that the monitor in our "car" was busted, a Buzz Lightyear who was 20 minutes late for his photo-op -- all things that happen anywhere, except of course DisneyWorld that is. The maps, well they weren't quite as detailed or easy to follow and the photo-ops were never where they were listed to be. I understand that this was largely driven by the heat, but...... it's Southern California -- uhm hullo, didn't they know it'd be hot in August?

The BlockParty Bash was awesome -- the 'lil man danced and Bo Peep twirled him around. It was a little boy's dream-come-true. My heart broke when he looked up with his enormous brown eyes and signed for "more, more" and we had to tell him that it was over.

I have to give two thumbs up to the waitresses that took care of us in Downtown Disney at the ESPN Zone and the House of Blues -- I mean, they really knew how to help out a couple trying to have lunch with two babies.

Side Note: I got a great tip from Kara over at CapeBuffalo one day when the Big Dubya & I were dining in a restaurant with the Buffalo family. I was still pregnant with 'lil Dubya and wondered why she ordered Baby Buffalo's food as soon as we sat......before she even opened a menu herself she was ordering a hotdog or something for kiddo..... it was a stroke of genius. The kid's food comes right away and you can help them get started with it before yours even comes -- isn't it amazing the 'lil tips you can pick up from the more seasoned moms????.

The ESPN Zone's food wasn't very good -- but the service was such, that we didn't really care. The food at the House of Blues was outstanding -- the Big Dubya even tried something new. I also have to note that I LOVE the dudes who do curbside check-in at LAX. When you've got two carseats, a double stroller, two squirmy babies and a week's worth of luggage..... curbside check-in is a gift from God!

Overall, I really liked Disneyland -- it is much, much smaller than DisneyWorld -- but the way the two parks and Downtown Disney all share a common courtyard makes it really manageable to hop from one to the other throughout the day, even with two wee ones in tow. It also makes the characters a bit more accessible. We got to see most of the ones we wanted up close multiple times because the crowds aren't so huge. It was also easy to find a quiet shady spot to sit and enjoy a cold adult beverage while the kiddies snoozed in the stroller.

If your kids are fans of the Pixar movies, and you have the opportunity -- the Block Party Bash is really worth it.

Hmmmm, 'lil Dubya, DDS?..... maybe

Just back from a wonderful, albeit whirlwind trip to California....... cousin's wedding in Santa Monica, miniature family-reunion at Hermosa Beach and then a couple of days at Disneyland in Anaheim (longer post on all of that later).

In the meantime, let's just say...... the 'lil Dubya got to spend some quality time with his Pixar heroes. After giving Lightening McQueen a good polish......


He decided Mater needed some dental work

Safe & Sound in Santa Monica

So, here we are -- safe & sound in Santa Monica.

The kids were amazingly well behaved, despite hardly sleeping at all on the flight. People actually stopped to comment on how well behaved they were...... I was so proud.

Taking it easy today -- got a rehearsal dinner tonight, but did go for a nice walk this morning -- this truly is where the beautiful people live.

Let's just hope the kids are as well behaved during the various wedding festivities.

California, here we come!

I know it's been a while... and it's not that I haven't had anything to say.... it's just that I haven't really had the time to say it.

This has been one of "those" summers....... one where every weekend has been overbooked with things we "just have to" attend and a bunch of things we "just can't miss"

A wedding in Ireland, a christening in New York, The Police rockin' Fenway Park, friends home visiting from Colorado, another wedding.... this time in Santa Monica. That's right, the Big Dubya and I are packing up the lowercase dubyas and we are flying (on a completely sold out flight) to CA on Thursday night. Can you hear the fear in my voice?

Six hours people....... a two year old and an 8 month old.

I'm trying not to panic...... but please pray for us, and for those poor unfortunate souls who sit near us.

C'mon, Go Check Us Out!

Our latest post is up..... I be we aren't alone in this particular DadSaidMomSaid issue.

Just Click the banner.....

it'll bring you right to our post.....

you know you want to --

so click already

Excuse me, Did I hear you right? Did you say SEVENTEEN????

Okay, I know..... it's been documented here and here, and you guys are probably tired of reading about how I want another baby and the Big Dubya's not so convinced.... although, recently his stance as changed from an "ABSOLUTELY NO F'ING WAY!" to a "Well, maaayyybbeee we can think about it"

Anyway, check these guys out!

She's 40, he's 42 and they just welcomed baby number SEVENTEEN!!!!!

Yes, I just wrote that SEVENTEEN.... you didn't misread anything.... SEVENTEEN!


That's right folks, SEVENTEEN children ranging from newborn to 19 years old..... they've had two sets of twins. Of course, part of me wonders if she even goes through labor anymore of if they just fall out -- yeah, okay sorry, I know way TMI.

And people think I'm nuts for wanting a measly three!

And I sat, sobbing at my desk

This time last year was a wonderful time in the Dubya household......

The 'lil man was 13 months old -- he'd skipped over walking and gone right to running. I was 20 weeks pregnant with the 'lil lady...... I'd just started feeling her move around, she was strong and healthy. My cousin M, was also expecting -- after 8 years of trying and more than a dozen unsuccessful in-vitros, she was 27½ weeks along with twins. Pregnancy wasn't kind to her -- at 13 weeks she was put on strict bedrest and at 21 weeks she'd been hospitalized -- she was kept inverted around the clock in an effort to stop pre-term labor. She was unable to shower or use the bathroom, she remained that way for 42 days.

I came into work and opened this email from my cousin D (M's younger sister):

-----Original Message-----
From: D
Sent: Monday, July 24, 2006 9:54 AM
To: MrsBigDubya
Subject: M delivered

M delivered 2 boys this morning. I don't have any details yet about weight and their status, other that they're in ICU. I'm waiting for my parents to call me with updates. I tried calling your mom's house, but I got the machine, so I didn't leave a message. If you can pass the news along.

I'll get back to you as I get more news.
D

I sat at my desk and sobbed. As I felt my own baby flutter around inside, I felt an enormous sense of relief, gratitude and guilt. How could this have happened to her? This is a woman who was born to be a mother -- her dreams were finally coming true and now this.

I cried on and off all day.... glued to my phone and email, hoping..... praying for some sort of positive news.... and dreading the possibility of learning that the unthinkable had happened.

The next message came -- but didn't offer much in the way of hope -- the situation was still beyond critical

-----Original Message-----
From: D
Sent: Monday, July 24, 2006 4:23 PM
To: Mrs Big Dubya
Subject: (no subject)

Not much of an update, but here's what I know.

She delivered naturally. Apparently she felt the babies coming early this morning and they were going to do a csection but I don't think that there was enough time.

Baby A was 2lb 2oz, no length size available.
Baby B was 1lb 15ozs, no length size available. This baby is on a vent.

That is all that I know. I am headed to the hospital shortly so I let you know more info later
D

More tears, more prayers, more gratitude, more guilt...... layer on some feelings of helplessness and a primal urge to go home and hold the 'lil Dubya as tight as I could. I'd had a baby in the NICU, I knew the terror....... and our 'lil man wasn't even that serious.

The message I received the next day was more of the same

-----Original Message-----
From: D
Sent: Tuesday, July 25, 2006 6:42 AM
To: Mrs Big Dubya
Subject: (no subject)

Well, I went to the hospital last night and saw the babies. They are really tiny. Baby A was 13 & 3/4 inches long, weighing 2lbs & 2 ozs and Baby B was 13 & 1/4inches, weighing 1 lb & 15 ozs. M looked good and was in better spirits than I imagined. One of her friends that is a NICU nurse was visiting while we were there, so I didn't get to talk to her too much. She had to have an episiotomy, all the way from her vagina to rectum because the doctor had to put his entire hand in to either turn a baby or pull one out (I never got the full story on that).She hasn't chosen their names so I'll just keep referring to them as A & B.

A is on a CPAP mask and in an incubator already. He was crying a lot while we were there, which is a good sign. He had a little hat on him and his little eyebrows looked like they were blond. B is on a ventilator and still in the tray under the lights. I don't know when he'll be able to go into the incubator. I really didn't get to stay near him too long because the nurse who was working on him was a real bitch, and M was trying to get information out of her while her NICU friend was there so she could get a better understanding of how his condition is. My parents asked me why B wasn't in the incubator yet and I didn't have the heart to tell them that the most critical preemies are kept on the tray for easy access in case of the need to resuscitate.

They'll start doing scans by the end of the week to check and see if there is any organ damage and take each day as it comes with other health issues. I will keep the updates coming and now I'm going to try and go back to sleep for an hour before the kids get up.
D

The days and weeks that followed were filled with more tears, more sobbing and more prayers.

So, now here we are -- a year later. It's been a long year for M -- a year filled with an open heart surgery, two hernia repairs, and several rounds of laser eye surgery. Baby B was on continuous oxygen for many months and Baby A had some health issues of his own.

The 'lil Dubya, 'liller Dubyette and I attended their first birthday on Saturday -- they are small, but strong -- they are crawling, pulling themselves up and beginning to take their first steps.

Miracles happen...... I saw two of them on Saturday afternoon.

Now, Why is this breaking news?

LINDSAY LOHAN REPORTEDLY ARRESTED FOR

DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE AGAIN

Back on September 13th, 2001 -- I signed up to get breaking news emailed to me, I'm sure a lot of you did too. I was working in a high rise in downtown Boston, right across the street from the hotel where the terrorists stayed the night before the attacks -- we were evacuated many times in the coming weeks and I couldn't get enough news.... internet, newspaper, TV, radio.... I was a news-junkie.

In the days and weeks that followed, these news alerts brought information about the plots, the bravery of the passengers, the heroes that helped the injured, the dead, those left behind mourning. This was news I didn't want to miss -- I was an American and the nation needed to hurt together, mourn together and heal together..... news helped me feel like part of that process.

Even now, I get the pop-up window of a News Alert in my inbox and my heart sinks..... oh no, what now? Good God, please don't let it be another attack.

And then I go to check my email and I learn about something f'ing stupid.

MEMO

To: Fox, MSNBC, CNN, etc.

From: Mrs Big Dubya

RE: Breaking News Emails

Declaration of War or a break out of Peace IS Breaking News

Paris Hilton getting sent home from prison because of a tummy ache IS NOT Breaking News

Outbreak of the Plague IS Breaking News
The Paternity Test of Anna Nicole's Baby IS NOT Breaking News

The Boston Red Sox Winning the World Series IS Breaking News

A-Rod cheating on his wife IS NOT Breaking News

Now, stop sending me nonsense news alerts or I'm going to have to cancel you!

To Croc or not to Croc...

About 6 or 7 years ago, the Big Dubya and I were vacationing on Martha's Vineyard. We were taking a leisurely stroll through Vineyard Haven and came across a guy with a cart. The guy was selling these huge clunky plastic/rubber shoes and was begging us to stop and try them on.

I don't know about you.... but I remember these from the early '80s and figured that they'd probably cut my feet -- so, we kept walking.

Fast forward to 2007 and holy crap -- the clunky plastic/rubber shoes are called Crocs, and they are all the rage.

I've been making fun of these things from the start -- I mean, give me a break.... could they be any more stupid looking? But, Aunt P told me that her girlfriend (a NICU nurse who spends a ton of time on her feet) swears by them, as do all her co-workers. The Big Dubya and I were still skeptical -- but then, we were in Disney and I saw them in one of the shops.... (they had ones w/ Mickey Mouse shaped holes) I just had to try them on -- ya know, see what the fuss was about.

Imagine my shock and surprise -- they are comfortable.

So, tell me readers -- To Croc? or Not to Croc?

Home Again, Home Again

Aunt P and I are home and WOW....... it's been a whirlwind.

I missed the babies (and the Big Dubya of course) immensely, but we had a ball. We laughed and laughed..... and then we laughed some more.

For such a short trip, we got an awful lot done -- we did a tour of this and of this, we went to our cousin's wedding reception in Dublin (the purpose of the trip), we met an aunt for coffee, did a big family lunch in Wicklow, had a night out that included watching some street performers do some crazy stuff with fire (no really, we've got pictures & video) and we even managed to squeeze in a couple of pints here and here.

I'm sure we'll post more about the trip and all the family dirt we uncovered in the coming days..... but for now, I've just got to get used to not eating every 20 minutes.

Blasphemy

We've got rules people......

I know that some rules are meant to be broken, but others just aren't.

As mentioned before, Aunt P and I are in Dublin for our cousin's wedding reception. The party is tonight, so we arrived yesterday and will head home on Monday. We flew out Thursday night and landed Friday morning -- around 7:45am Irish time (2:45 Boston time).

Thankfully our hotel let us check in early and we took a great nap -- would have taken a shower, but there were no towels (story for another post).

After our nap we decided to go explore a little -- but it was pouring rain. So, we opted to grab lunch in the lobby bar instead -- hoping the weather would clear in a bit. Of course, we had a beer or two as well -- Aunt P had one of these, while I stuck with one of these (this is an actual photo of our beers). It's cute that they put your beer in the appropriate glass (they had no Kilkenny ones clean, so Aunt P had to compromise).

And this is where we witnessed the egregious offense.

Back the story up a bit, for years the only American beer you could get in Ireland was Budweiser and maybe MGD -- interestingly enough, light beer hadn't really caught on -- still hasn't.

But, a few years ago while I was here (the Big Dubya and I were still dating) Coors Light was introduced -- and it has become wildly popular (it's one of the only light beers you can find in Ireland). Anyway, lots of girls drink Coors Light over here. Now, I like Coors Light (probably more than the average person) but when I'm in Ireland..... it's just wrong to drink American beer -- so, I opt for Carlsberg, Smithwicks, Heineken or of course Guinness. Guinness is a good choice because it is supposed to be served at room temperature -- seems like cold is a tough thing to achieve in beverages over here -- but we are going to the Guinness brewery today, so I figured I'd save my Guinness enjoyment for our trip to the mother ship, St. James Gate.

Anyway, yesterday we were sitting in the bar enjoying our beer & deep fried food (sausage & chips.... the had no curry) and someone ordered a Bulmers and a Coors Light...... ON ICE!!!

Yes, they poured their cider and their beer into glasses of ice. We also witnessed people drinking wine on ice -- Aunt P and I were horrified...... beer over ice? how could you do such a thing?

Life from Dublin, Ireland

So, all went as planned....

A couple of minor glitches in meeting up with my dad, a.k.a. Grandad (we were supposed to meet him at the bar in front of security.... he was at the bar at the gate).

Thumbs up to Aer Lingus..... they've got some fancy new planes -- they've got these little TVs in the back of the headrest (a la Jet Blue) so that helped pass the time quite nicely.

It's raining here..... and looks like it will be for the next couple of days (bummer)

Aunt P's lying in bed reading some trashy romance novel.... I'm gonna get her to come get fatty food with me -- nobody does fried food like the Irish :)

I know, I'm a total duphis

I cried when I left the house this morning.

I'll only be gone a couple of days, but...... I'm going to miss my babies ( their dad too, but...)

I'll try to post from Dublin

Cheers!

Wanted -- One Good Bra

So, that's all I want.... one good bra.

I'm not a large woman, so this bra doesn't have to wonder or perform a miracle.... it doesn't need to stand up on it's own or provide bullet proof protection -- just something simple, something washable, something comfortable.....

I went to Victoria's Secret this morning..... first time in several years -- and all they had were these foam monstrosities.

These things were so big and thick..... they wouldn't fit inside my clothes -- AND they were $50!!!!

$50 for ONE bra

We have a very busy summer planned here in Dubya land..... trips and parties, concerts and weddings, RedSox games and..... did I mention a RedSox game????


When you've got two kids two and under, it makes everything a little more challenging -- so, when I learned that I had three cousins getting married this summer -- we had some decisions to make.


One cousin is from Ireland, but lives in Australia -- she opted for an intimate immediate family affair in Ireland, so we had no decision to make there..... we weren't invited, and that's just fine. Another cousin, is from Ireland but lives in CA he's getting married in August. He moved out here after college and lived with my family in Boston on and off for a few years while he got on his feet. He's almost like another sibling, so that's a wedding the whole family's gonna trek out to the west coast for.


Another cousin is from Ireland, and lives in Ireland but got married in Tuscany.


It was a tough call, but a trip to Tuscany and a trip to CA in the same six week period is just too much for the babies (not to mention the pocketbook) so, we opted not to make the trip to Italy. The same cousin is having a wedding reception in Ireland for all those who didn't make the trip to Italy -- so, I'm going to shoot over to attend that this weekend with Aunt P, but without the Big Dubya and the 'lil ones.


All I can say is that it sounded like a good idea at the time..... now, I'm freakin' people!

I can't leave my babies......

I know the Big Dubya is their father, and wonderful with them, more than capable of a couple of days alone with them -- but he's not the Mommy.... I'm the Mommy -- how can I leave them?????

Did I mention that Dublin's forecast is for rain.... all weekend?

When your friends become parents

When you are young and single, it's not all that uncommon for you to go on vacation with your friends..... that's what young, single people do.

When you are coupled-up (married or not), it's not all that uncommon for you to go on vacation with your coupled-up friends..... that's what couples do.

When you have a family, it's not all that uncommon for you to go on vacation with other families... that's what families do, right?

We go on vacation in groups all the time -- as a matter of fact, we just got back from a trip to Disney with my sister (Aunt P), her husband and my mother. In August we are heading to CA with my parents, my sister & her husband to meet up with some extended family for my cousin's wedding. In the spring, we have a couple of trips in the works -- one with the Big Dubya's parents, and another with my family -- and yet another trip in the works for next fall. It actually seems like we do more group trips than "just us" ones -- and that's okay with me.

Here's the part that gets tricky.

When your friends have children and you have children -- yet, your parenting style/philosophy just doesn't synch up.

When we go away, or when we stay in the home of another family -- we are, understandably, in unusually close-quarters. So, I try to over-compensate -- make sure that my kids are, to the extent possible, on their best behavior.

My rationale is that they are my kids, and cleaning up after them and correcting them shouldn't be a burden for anyone else to shoulder. In the event that someone else does need to correct my child for mis-behaving -- then, the adult is always right. Most of our friends feel the same way, and so -- there's no issue.

But, what about when your friends who (despite their claim to be very strict) are much more passive with their children?

Their kids can watch TV (regardless of content) as much or as often as they want -- they use fresh language with adults, and it's considered "cute," they eat their meals.... wherever they want... kitchen table, living room..... whatever.

When their kids get up in the morning, these parents remain in bed assuming that you'll take care of them.... or that they can busy themselves.

They have no problem leaving the morning breakfast dishes (remaining partially chewed food and all) on the table (or the couch) when they leave for the day...... all the while using the excuse "it's okay to relax the rules, they are on vacation"

These are also the parents who say "oh, kids do that" at birthday parties when their kid rushes over and starts opening all the gifts.

Makes me think we won't be vacationing with these friends again anytime soon.

Are babies addictive?

Today's Post is Sponsored by the Number 3!

In June 2005, the Big Dubya and I welcomed our first son (known here as the 'lil Dubya). Of course I knew my life would change, but I'm not sure I could have ever imagined how much I would love this little person.

When he was about four or five months old, I started to get the itch.... I was ready to have another baby. The Big Dubya thought I was out of my mind..... he was still reeling from the trauma of the 'lil man's arrival -- but it didn't take long for him to agree that it was time to start trying for our second and final child. He told me repeatedly "there will be no number three" and even though I'm not sure I meant it, I said that was fine -- we still had no idea how my body would handle pregnancy the second time around. Unlike the first time, we got pregnant right out of the gate -- the 'lil man was 8 months old.

In November 2006, we welcomed our first daughter (known here as the 'lil Dubyette). We did encounter some complications, but.... they were managed very closely and her delivery was fairly uneventful. Again, I knew my life would have to change in order to juggle a newborn and a toddler -- but I had no idea the joy and happiness this little person would add to our lives.

Once again, when she was four or five months -- I started to wanting to try for a third. I know, I know -- I must have a screw loose. I really hoped that it was just hormones and that it would pass -- but it hasn't. The Big Dubya has made his feelings pretty clear, he wants to be done. We even posted some of the pro/con arguments that have been bandied about here.

Cognitively, the arguments against a number three are many..... our ages, our financial situation, our house, the two gorgeous and healthy children we already have..... I know that being done is a good answer, being done makes sense, we have the perfect little family..... so, why do I still ache for a third? Why do I look at the 'lil Dubya & 'lil Dubyette playing together and wish they had another baby brother or sister to grow up with?

I'm only half-joking when I ask.... Am I a junky? Do I have a problem? Do I need to go to baby-rehab to get this baby-addiction under control?

The Big Dubya's still against the idea, although I do catch him having the occasional moment of weakness -- and then he asks.... "Okay, so if we have #3, will you want #4?" I honestly don't think so, but I can't say for sure..... I know that if we ever did move forward with #3 that surgical measures would be taken to prevent any further discussion..... granted, I suspect that he'd have me committed at that point anyway, so......

Check us Out!

Our latest post is up at Dad said Mom said.... check it out, okay?